


Not How You Imagined It

by Because_Kling



Category: USWNT - Fandom
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-17
Updated: 2018-05-02
Packaged: 2018-07-24 15:19:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 21
Words: 35,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7513240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Because_Kling/pseuds/Because_Kling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Neither of them thought they were going to end up like this, but here they are. How will they deal with it? Will Alex stick around? Will Tobin ask for help when she needs it?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Waking Up

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a story that popped in my head, so I decided to take a Talex spin on it. I hope it doesn't suck because it is the first thing I have ever decided to actually write. I welcome your criticism, but I would appreciate you not being an asshole. Thank you and enjoy.

She can feel someone’s hand in hers before she hears the voice. It is that voice she loves so much, but she can’t quite tell what the voice is saying. She is rambling about something, “Training was not the same without you today. Everyone was asking how you are and if they were aloud to come see you. I’m not supposed to tell you this, but Abby talked to coach about your roster spot and he said that your name will remain on the roster. At least until he absolutely has to change it. Do you hear that? That means you have to wake up. You have to wake up, because I need you.” She can hear her start to cry.

“Lex,” the rambling girl stops and looks up meeting the they eyes that she had missed so much, “Lex, don’t cry.”

“Tobin?” the forward hesitates as she gently squeezes the midfielder’s hand.

“Last I checked that’s me,” the older girl joked making Alex chuckle. She hadn’t laughed in days.

“Hold on for me okay? Stay awake so I can go get a doctor.”

“Okay,” Tobin says as she tries to gain more awareness, Alex sprints out the door returning a moment later.

“The doctor will be here in a few minutes. I have to call your parents real quick and tell the you are awake.”

“My parents?” Tobin asks groggily.

“Yes. I sent them to the apartment to shower and rest for a while. They haven’t been gone long,” the younger girl looks at the clock. “They might not even be there yet.” Tobin tries to nod to say she understands, but everything is still so stiff. “Hey don’t try and move to much, okay?” the forward warns and she sits back down pressing the call button.

Alex was right, they hadn’t made it to the apartment yet. As soon as she told them they turned back around. They arrived at the room just as the doctor had finished checking the machines Tobin was hooked up to, and Tobin herself. “Mr. and Mrs. Heath, just in time.” He gave them a gentile smile. “Well Tobin, it is good to see you awake, and good to see this one finally smile,” he nods towards Alex. “You took a pretty brutal beating kid, and your organs didn’t like whatever had been pumped into your system. However, we managed to get them under control and patch up the parts of you that needed it. After that it was all up to you to come back to us. We thought you were going to a few times before now, but the medication we had given you for your injuries pulled you back. I just have a few more questions, and then I will let you enjoy your family for a little bit before we need to run so test. Think you can handle that?”

“Sure thing Doc.”

“Fantastic. What is your full name?”

“Tobin Powell Heath.”

“What is your birthday?”

“May 29, 1988.”

“And last, do you know what day it is?”

Tobin though for a minute, but honestly had no idea. “No, I’m sorry I don’t.”

“Alright, that could be because of how long you were asleep. Can you tell me what the last day you remember was?”

Tobin thought back. She looked directly at Alex and immediately had a day in her mind. “Friday, June 6, 2014.”

“That’s perfect,” Tobin gave him a confused look. “I will let your family explain and help you put together any missing details, but it seems to me other than missing a few days you are going to be just fine. I will be back in a few hours to take you for a few tests.” He smiled and left them.

“Tobin!” her mom yelled and hugged her baby tightly. “We are so sorry we weren’t here when you woke up!”

“It’s fine,” she reassured her. “Wait, what is today?”

Alex and Tobin’s parents looked at each other before Alex, who was sitting in a chair right next to the bed, grabbed her hand and answered her, “Tobin it’s the 18th. You have missed almost two weeks.”

“Two weeks! How did I miss two weeks? What happened?”

“You don’t remember anything?” Alex asked feeling her heart drop.

“I mean I remember going out with the team, but after that no.” Tobin watched as Alex’s happiness went away a little. Something was wrong. “Lex, what’s wrong?”

Alex perked back up, “nothing. I am so happy you are awake. I am going to go text the teams real quick, they will want to know you are awake.” She gave the older girl a soft smile before heading out the door.

“Mom, dad, what happened?”

“We don’t fully know. We got a call from Alex saying you were hurt. We have been here with you for about nine days. You don’t remember anything?”

“No. Not a thing.”

“That’s okay baby, you just woke up. I’m sure it will come back to you in the next few days,” Tobin’s mom reassured her.

“You’re probably right,” Tobin agreed. She could still tell something was off with Alex, but knew she wouldn’t say anything if her parents were there. “Any chance I could convince you guys to go back to what you were doing and going to get some rest?” she tried not holding her breath for the answer.

“We don’t want to leave you honey,” her mother started, “we just got you back.”

“Honey, I’m sure she will be right here when we get back,” her dad cut in, “and besides, Alex is right here to make sure she stays out of trouble and to help her if she needs anything. Just like she always is.”

Little did he know, Mr. Heath said something that made Alex feel even worse. The Heaths didn’t notice, but Tobin did. Tobin always noticed when something was up with Alex. “Well alright,” Mrs. Heath agreed, “but only a few hours. We will be back with dinner after a while.”

“Okay mom, love you both,” Tobin said to them as they reluctantly left the room. As the door closed she turned her attention to the younger girl, “alright Lex, are you going to tell me what is wrong now?”

“Do you really not remember anything after leaving the apartment that night?” she asked without lifting her head.

“Oh Alex, I remember so much more than just walking out the door, but you didn’t think I would tell my parents about how I stared at the most beautiful girl in the world the whole night only for _her_ to come on to _me_ on the dance floor did you? I remember everything up until that final shot I took before getting in the cab, but I’m sure it’ll come back to me.”

“Oh Toby, I wish the things you are going to remember where happy,” the forward had to hold back her tears wondering if she wanted to tell Tobin what happened, or let her remember.

“What is it? What wont I like?”

“This is all my fault Tobin. I’m the reason you have missed two weeks of your life.”

“Alex what are you talking about?” Tobin didn’t believe Alex. How could her best friend hurt her? “There is no way this is your fault. I don’t remember much, but I know you and I know you wouldn’t hurt me like this.”

“But I did. I may not have personally physically hurt you, but I did cause this. You are here because of things I said to you,” Alex started to get up to leave. She knew she couldn’t let Tobin see her break down like this.

“Lex wait,” Tobin tried to sit up and reach for her hand, but the sudden movements were too much and she winched in pain. The forward turned back quickly at the sound of her best friend in pain. “If what you’re saying is right then I have gone almost two weeks without talking to you and seeing your beautiful smile, so sit and talk with me. Tell me about what I have missed and we can fill in the not so fun stuff later. It doesn’t need to be time specific, just tell me about training and the teams.”

“Okay,” Alex sat back down and began to tell her about all the things she had missed in the past two weeks. About the Thorns taking a few days of practice off, “and when we came back everyone said how weird it was. I missed a few more practices myself, but we can talk about that later. The gals have been calling and texting all the time. Wanting to know how you are. Kelley even made me put the phone on speaker so she could talk to you,” she chuckled remembering Kelley yelling into the phone something about how maybe now she would finally sit still long enough to watch a movie and how Alex had to take care of her and bring her whatever she wanted. “She’s right you know, I will take care of you and do whatever you want. I owe you that much.”

“You don’t owe me anything,” Tobin said smiling at Alex sleepily. She could tell all of this was wearing Tobin out.

“Get some sleep Toby, I promise I will be right here, or at least close, when you wake up.”


	2. Remembering Pt. 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To be clear, I have decided to keep this in a time where Alex still plays for Portland. Sorry if some go you do not like that. Also, tot he people who commented on chapter 1: I am very sorry this took so long to Post. Much love.

Alex hadn’t realized that she had fallen asleep until she was being woken up by Tobin thrashing around in the bed next to her. She had been sitting in the chair with her head resting on the bed watching Tobin sleep when had slipped away herself. Admittedly she hadn’t slept much since the night Tobin went missing, so the rest was welcomed. What was not welcomed was the knee to the head she received from a clearly upset Tobin. “Tobin? What’s wrong?” she groaned not realizing exactly what was going on. After a second of the older girl not stopping, Alex sat up and realized the girl was sweating and looked in pain. “Tobin! Wake up, its just a dream,” she pleaded trying to pull the midfielder from her nightmare. She crawled in the bed the best she could and held her as close as possible shushing her the whole time. “Tobin, baby its okay. I’m here and you are safe now. No one is trying to hurt you. Calm down for me babe.” She felt Tobin start to settle down and loosened her grip.

            “Alex?” came and uncharacteristically small voice from wrapped up in her arms. “Alex,” she said more confidently burying her face in the forward’s chest, “I think I know what happened to me.” She felt Alex hold her a little tighter.

            “What do you mean?”

            “I had dream, but it felt more real. More like a memory,” they both start to sit up and readjust to more comfortable positions. “It feels real. And I can actually remember it after being woken up. So it couldn’t have been just a dream, right?”

            “Maybe I can help you figure it out.”

            “Do you know what happened to me?” Tobin looked at her and saw a world of pain in her eyes. Alex could see the wheels turning in her head.

            “Not exactly,” Ale started. “I know why you went missing and where they found you. The only bit I know about what happened in that time is what the doctors and police could piece together. Only you and the person who took you know what really happened.”

            “Okay, what do you know?” Alex did he best to look anywhere but at the girl in her arms. Just thinking about the report she and Tobin’s got while Tobin was asleep made her stomach churn. “Alex,” Tobin said a little louder, “what happened to me?”

            “I only know what the report said,” she finally managed to say while fighting back her emotions. “How about you tell me about your dream and then I can tell you if that matches up with what we know?”

            “Okay, I think I can do that,” the midfielder agreed, “but I’m warning you it isn’t pretty. So, if you need me to stop okay?”

            That is when the younger girl knew the report and assumptions were probably right, “alright. Just start with what you remember and skip anything you can’t.”

 

 

**Flashback**

            Tobin was use to it by now, the constantly waiting on Alex so they can leave and her always making them late. However annoying it could be, it was always worth it when she finally came into the living room of their shared apartment. The midfielder was sitting on the couch patiently waiting on her roommate. She had long since given up standing and waiting by the door for her to be ready. Even when she finally emerged from the hour plus of primping she still had a few things to do before she would leave the house. So Tobin sat, “Alex we are going to be late, again,” she would call half-heartedly down the hallway. The younger girl would send back a groan as a reply while not trying to hurry in the slightest. This was the routine Tobin had grown to love because of how beautiful her best friend looked when she finally decided she was ready. Tobin thought she was beautiful wither way, but these nights were even better.

            After a while Alex waltzed into the room and Tobin nearly dropped her phone when she saw her. Tonight was even more special than usual. She had on a tight black dress and killer strapped heels. Tobin let her eyes travel up the forward until they landed on the best part. Alex was wearing a necklace Tobin had gotten her when they first started playing in Portland. It was simple and not really a fancy piece of jewelry, but Alex loved it. The piece was a small locket with a picture of them in front of their apartment on the day they moved in. Tobin smiled every time she saw the younger girl wearing it. Alex had never admitted it, but it was her favorite piece of jewelry. The younger girl didn’t notice her best friend’s eyes on her because as usual she was looking for something. Tobin managed to gain her composure enough to stand up and walk towards the kitchen, “What ya looking for Lex?” she asked watching the confused forward as she walked.

            “My black clutch purse. I could have sworn it was in here after I used it last week.”

            “It was. I was cleaning the other day and saw it. I put it in your closet, above your shoes.”

            “Oh gosh! I never even thought to look there,” she said and she walked towards the midfielder. “Thank you so much Toby!” she half yelled as she kissed Tobin on the cheek and ran to her room leaving the older girl in shock as to what just happened.

            “This is going to be a long night,” Tobin said to herself. There was nothing she wanted more than for that moment to happen for the res of their lives, but in her mind that would never happen. Alex would never see her as anything more than a best friend and a roommate.

            Alex stopped when she entered her room realizing what she had just done. “Stupid Alex. How could you do that? Tobin doesn’t feel that way about you,” she said to herself. “You haven’t even started drinking yet. Ugh, this is going to be a long night.” She grabbed her purse from the closet and ran back out, “alright, I think I’m finally ready. How late are we?”

            “Meh, only a few minutes. I think I can make up the time driving,” Tobin smiled. She had learned how to get Alex places as close to on time as possible over the past two years.

            “Then why were you yelling at me!?”

            “Hold on there,” Tobin started, chuckling at her friend, “I never yelled, and because I didn’t want to be late. Now come on, I’m sure the team will be waiting on us when we get there.” The forward faked being mad as they walked to the car, but the second the older girl opened her door she couldn’t help but smile. Tobin had always been like this. She always made Alex feel like she was the prettiest girl in the world.

            “Thank you Toby,” she would always reply. She did this tonight, but tonight felt different. The connection she usually felt with Tobin felt stronger. Tobin could feel it too. Alex hadn’t been able to take her eyes off of Tobin since she came out of her room. The midfielder was wearing dark jeans maroon button up. Alex had seen the same outfit a million times, but tonight it seemed to look so much better. She shook her head, “cut it out Morgan,” she said to herself as Tobin went around to the driver side. She had been crushing on her best friend for the longest time and she couldn’t tell her.

            As they drove to the restaurant for pre-dancing dinner it took everything the older girl had not to reach other and grab the forward’s hand. It’s not like they had never held hands before. Tonight just felt different. Tonight Tobin felt like if she reached over Alex would sense that the older girl meant it as more than a gesture of friendship, and would pull away. She couldn’t take that risk. So they drove. With only the sound of the radio between them. They were both thankful when they pulled up to the restaurant. They hopped out of the car, seeing some of their teammates cars already there, and went inside.

            “What is this?” they heard Allie Long start when they walked through the door. “Are Tobin and Alex actually on time to a team function?! I don’t believe it. I refuse. These must be imposters,” the whole group started to laugh. The two lovesick girls started to loosen up and act normal with each other.

            The night continued on as usual. The team had dinner and went dancing, and the two shamelessly flirted with each other more as they had more to drink. Everyone but them could tell how they felt about each other. As the two had a little more to drink, Alex more than Tobin, the closer they got when they danced. They started to forget about everyone else around them. After a while, it was just them. They had gone into their own little world, and their teammates just looked on thinking, “freaking finally.” Alex drank more and more while Tobin tried to limit herself. However, the more the younger girl came onto her the more the mid needed a drink. Eventually, Alex looked up at the older girl, leaned in and whispered, “lets go home Toby.” It was simple, but it had the midfielder moving quicker that she thought she could. Tobin quickly determined she wouldn’t be able to drive, so they agreed to get a cab. Alex went to say goodbye to their teammates and Tobin quickly took one last shot to calm her down.

            As soon as they were in the car the forward jumped on Tobin. Tobin gained her composure quickly and kissed the forward back. The make out was hot and heavy and stayed that way the whole way to the apartment. As they make their way into the apartment and close the door Alex has Tobin pinned against the wall. As Tobin starts to regain control of her thoughts and actions she pushes the younger girls back off of her, “Alex we shouldn’t do this.”

            “What do you mean? You seem to want this,” she sounded hurt.

            “Trust me babe, I want this more than anything, but we are drunk. Do you really want this to happen as the result of a drunken night? I don’t want you to wake up in the morning and regret this.”

            Not understanding, Alex got angry and defensive quickly, “so you think I only want this because I am drunk? You think I am some girl that just goes and gets drunk and screws anything with legs?”

            “Alex, that isn’t what I said,” Tobin tried to start explaining herself, but was cut off.

            “No. If that is what you think, then you can just leave!” she was shouting now. Tobin was worried a neighbor might hear, but she was more worried about Alex trying to kick her out.

            “Alex, don’t be like this,” she tried softly.

            “Just get out! If you are going to lead me on then leave me, I don’t want you staying here!”

            Tobin knew the girl was drunk, but she did as she was told. It was the only way to get her to calm down. She grabbed her keys and wallet and walked out the door. She walked down to the bar on the corner and started to drink.

 

**End Flashback**

 

            Alex had started crying at this point. “Is that what you meant?” Tobin started, “when you said it was your fault, is that what you meant?” The younger girl nodded her head in response and the tears kept coming. The midfielder pulled her into a hug and held her as she sobbed uncontrollably for a minute. “Alex, hear me when I say this, this is not your fault. It happened, but it’s not your fault. I could have gone somewhere else. I could have refused to leave the apartment. Lots of different thins could have happened. The bottom like is this isn’t your fault and I do not blame you.”

            “How are you so sweet to me right now? You should hate me right now. You shouldn’t want to look at me, much less hold me.”

            “Well kid, I love you.”

            “I love you too.”

            They held each other there a little bit longer as Alex snuggled into Tobin more. Finally, the other girl spoke up, “babe, I hate to do this, but you gotta move. You are on my ribs, and they kind of hurt.”

            The forward jumped up, “I’m so sorry Tobin!”

            “Hey, its okay. We just gotta readjust is all.”

            They got situated to where Tobin could still comfort Alex, but didn’t have a very sharp elbow in her already busted side. “Better?” the forward asked.

            “Much,” she replied as they sat in silence for another moment. After a minute Tobin decided to speak up, “Lex, there is more. I remember more, but there is a gap between where I stopped and what I remember next. This is also the part I really hope isn’t true.”

            Alex could hear the fear in her best friend’s voice, “how about this, we don’t have to talk about it right now. We can do something else like watch TV, or sleep. Then, later we can talk about it. One thing at a time. Okay?”

            “I like that idea,” a suddenly tired Tobin replied. Now it was her turn to snuggle into Alex.


	3. Pizza and Sleep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all, I am super sorry about not updating in like literally forever. I went back to school and started preseason, and then classes started, I got moved out of my room and into an on campus apartment, and then the apartment flooded. Basically life is a mess. I promise to try and do better. This chapter is shorter than desired, but it is something nice and a little filler. I am working on the next chapter now and some of you will probably hate me, but i promise what I have in mind will make it worth it. Thanks for the love in advanced. Much love to you all.

Tobin’s parents arrived to the sight of the two girls snuggled up on the bed fast asleep. The scene was so sweet that they almost didn’t wake them, but they knew the girls needed to eat. Cindy Heath walked over to the sleeping girls and gently rubbed the younger girl’s arm, “Alex, honey, we’re back and we have food,” she said softly. Alex started to sit up, slightly confused from sleep. She slowly realized what was going on and carefully uncurled herself from around Tobin. “How long have you guys been asleep?” Cindy asked. 

“Well,” Alex sat up more, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes, “we talked for a few minutes after you left and then she fell asleep for a bit and I guess I nodded off in the chair. Then, she work back up and we talked for a while longer and decided another nap was needed. We were right, another nap was needed.”

Cindy chuckled at the girl’s retelling of what happened while they were gone, “I can imagine a lot of sleep is what you need dear. I don’t think I’ve seen you sleep at all since we have been here.” 

Alex knew she was right. She hadn’t slept, not really, since that night. She had gone to be that night mad and drunk, but in the back of her mind she knew Tobin would be back. She always came back. If Tobin was ever out later than Alex she would come in, check on Alex to see if she was asleep or up pacing like a mom, and then go to bed. It was a routine that Alex had gotten use to. However, when she woke up that next morning and there was no sign of Tobin she didn’t know what to do. She went the whole day just wondering around the apartment thinking about what happened. She talked herself out of being ad at Tobin and realized that she was in the wrong. She had a whole apology worked out for when Tobin finally did come home, but she never did. She hadn’t walked through the door and looked like a kicked puppy like Alex expected. Alex didn’t get a bit of sleep that night and the next morning is when she started calling people to find Tobin. She didn’t sleep or eat until Tobin was found. After she was found and safely in the hospital she only got a few hours of sleep and couldn’t manage to eat a full meal. “Yeah,” Alex replied shyly. “Should I wake her?” she asked seeing the food the Heaths had brought back. 

“Yeah, she should probably eat something. We weren’t sure what she’s want, but she has always loved pizza.”

“She will love it. It is usually her go-to when she doesn’t have to eat healthy, and I think right now she can eat whatever she wants,” she said as she shifted more so she could gently wake the sleeping girl. “Toby,” she cooed in a softer tone, “hey, Tobs, your parents are back. They brought pizza.” 

At the mention of food Tobin was instantly more awake. Everyone chuckled at the scene. “Did you say pizza Lex? What kinds?” was the first thing she said.

“Well, I think its safe to say our girl is just the same as before all of the,” Jeff laughed as he pulled out the paper plates.

“We have and all meat and a supreme,” Cindy informed them both, “Which one do you want baby girl?”

Tobin, with the help of Alex, slowly shifted into a position so she was sitting up more. “Can I have both?” she asked with a knowing grin.

Cindy chuckled to herself as she made Tobin’s plate, “of course dear. Don’t know why I even asked.”

“What do you want to drink Tobs?” Alex asked as she stretched and moved around to finish fully waking up. “I can run down to the vending machine real quick.”

“I’ll just have some water please and thank you.”

Alex made it back over to the bed with their drinks as Cindy was putting Tobin’s plate down. Tobin waited for Alex to grab some food and sit back down before starting to eat. It was a small  
gesture that Alex didn’t even notice, but the Heath parents did. They looked at each other knowingly and smiled. It seams they were the only ones who couldn’t see how in love they both were. 

After dinner and just sitting around talking for a while, the girls started to get tired again. It took a bit of convincing, but Cindy talked Alex into going back to their apartment to sleep for the night. Tobin, though she never wanted Alex to leave her side again, agreed that she should go. She knew Alex hadn’t slept well and promised to be right in the same bed when she got back in the morning. Alex took her time leaving, hugging both Jeff and Cindy before giving Tobin one final hug and a kiss on the forehead.

When she got home, she showered for the first time in days and went to Tobin’s room to grab a shirt. For the first time in weeks she slept through the night. Wrapped up in Tobin’s shirt, in Tobin’s bed, knowing her best friend would be home soon.


	4. Finally Sober

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What up y'all? Hope you like this one. I promise to get back into what exactly happened to Tobin soon, I am just having a bit of an issue deciding how to write it. Much love.

After a good nights rest Alex gathered a few things she knew Tobin would want with her now that she was awake, and headed back to the hospital. When she walked in the room she burst in the door expecting to see Tobin anxiously waiting her arrival, but what she found was an empty room. Her heart dropped and she began to panic. She dropped what she had carried in and pulled out her phone calling Cindy. Before she could even say hello Alex was bombarding her with questions, “Where are you? Where is she? Did something happen?”

“Alex, honey, they just took her for some tests. They said she would be back within the hour. We ran down to the cafeteria to grab some breakfast. You can join us if you’d like.” As the girl was wrapping her head around this information as calming down, an orderly was wheeling Tobin back into her room. 

“They just brought her back in, so I am going to stay here. Thank you though. I’m sorry I freaked out.”

She heard Cindy chuckle over the phone, “Its okay dear. I probably should have told you. Alright, you two get settled up there and we will be back in a bit.”

Alex hung up the phone and turned around as Tobin was getting situated on the bed, “Tobin Powell Heath you scared the hell out of me just now,” she started in as she went over to hug her best friend. 

“I’m sorry Lex, I didn’t know they would leave and you would get here before I got back. But look, I’m here and I’m okay. They just had to do a few more tests.”

“I got so scared when no one was here. You were supposed to be here when I walked in. No one was here. I thought something happened and no one called me,” she was talking a mile a minute and on the verge of tears. The thought of losing the one she loves after all of this was too much to handle. 

“Babe, I’m right here,” Tobin started as she reached a hand out to her. “I slept all night knowing you would be back in the morning and I would need my strength to spend the whole day talking to you. I promise I am not going anywhere for a long time.” 

Alex laid down on the bed next to her and let Tobin hold her for a few minutes. She didn’t stay like that long, knowing she would need to collect herself before Tobin’s parents got back. “I’m sorry,” she finally spoke up as she was sitting up. “I just can’t stand the thought of losing you. Not after everything that has happened.”

“Lex,” Tobin started as she took the younger girl’s hand, “I promise you that I do not plan on going anywhere for a long time. I will be right here with you. We will grow old together. I will do everything in my power to never lose you again. Because, to be honest with you, I was so scared when I thought I’d never see you again. Not for my safety, but because I would never get to look into these beautiful eyes and see that wonderful smile ever again.”

As Tobin was finishing her declaration Alex leaned in a connected their lips. Tobin reacted to the contact the only way she knew how. She leaned in and let Alex know this is everything she wanted. The kiss was short and sweet. It was everything their first kiss should have been. “That is how the first one should have gone,” Alex said as she leaned her forehead on Tobin’s. “Toby, I’m sorry that you are in this bed right now, and I am even more sorry it took almost losing you after a drunken argument to make me realize, and be able to admit, sober that you are more than just my best friend.”

“What matters is that we got here and I am okay. It may have taken a little more effort and some crazy circumstances, but we got here. Lex, I have known for a while how I feel about you, but I never thought you would ever feel the same way about me. I thought that it was a lost cause and could ruin us, so I kept my feelings to myself. I didn’t want to ruin what we already had. I would rather have you as my best friend than as nothing at all. You mean the world to me Alexandra Morgan and I want to be able to show you in more than just a friend way.”

“I love you Tobin,” Alex said as she laced their fingers together. 

“I love you too.”

Little did the girls know, the Heaths were standing right outside the door listening. They had seen the kiss and backed away to see where the girls would go from there. They looked at each other with love in their eyes knowing their baby girl would be in good hands. After another moment they walked into the room. They decided to play it off and let the girls tell them themselves.


	5. Nightmares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Highkey real sorry about not updating in forever Fam. Promise I'm not doing this to torture you. Much love.

The doctors wanted Tobin to stay in the hospital for a few days simply because of the affect the drugs had on her nervous system. She hated being stuck in the bed. Alex would bring stuff from their apartment to keep her entertained, but she really just wanted to get up and kick a ball. After a few days she was aloud to have more visitors, so the whole Thorns team came up and that kept her entertained for a few hours. 

After two days of Tobin being fully awake and the doctors reassuring them that she should be perfectly fine and the extra days were just a precaution because of the drugs and knowing she wont follow the bed rest rule at home, the Heaths went back home to Jersey. They knew that Alex wouldn’t let Tobin out of her site while she was healing. Tobin promised to call if any of the tests they were doing came back with bad results, and Alex promised to make her call. 

It was day five of being stuck in the hospital bed and Tobin is fast asleep with Alex awake in the chair next to her. Tobin hadn’t been sleeping at night because of nightmares and Alex knew this. Alex had gone home a few nights but could tell that the older girl wasn’t sleeping well and hated it. Tobin slept better with Alex around. She felt protected and safe. She knew the younger girl wouldn’t let anything bad happen to her. They had had plenty of time to talk the past few days about their relationship and where they wanted it to go. They had agreed that they wanted to be more than friends, but Tobin wanted to wait to make it official until she could take Alex on a date. So they were waiting until she was up and moving again. 

Alex heard Tobin start to move around in her sleep. She sat up, tempted to wake the girl from her bad dream. She decided it was best to let it play out. She could wake her up if need be. Tobin settled back down and so Alex tried to back to sleep. She turned on the TV so she could have some background noise; she hated how quiet the room could get. She started to drift back when all of a sudden Tobin was screaming and thrashing around in her bed. Alex froze. She had no idea what to do in that moment. She watched for a moment as Tobin kicked and yelled at whatever was attacking her in her dreams. Alex was brought back to reality and snapped out of her motionlessness at one clear phrase. “Please don’t,” Tobin said this one barely above a whisper. It was her broken voice that almost broke Alex as she jumped out of her chair and wrapped her arms around Tobin. 

“Shhh, Toby. It’s okay. I’ right here Toby. I’ve got you,” she said as she held Tobin, trying to keep her from hurting herself. It took about five minutes before Tobin finally woke up and realized what was going on. She opened her eyes and met Alex’s. There was so much fear and pain in them. Alex knew she had to be strong for Tobin. She couldn’t let her new fear and pain for her best friend keep her from being strong for her. Tobin had always been the stronger one of the two. She would always help Alex as she cried and never really let anyone see her hurt. This time was different. She needed to be held and protected. She couldn’t keep up the strong front through this. This was too much for her to handle by herself and she was realizing it in this moment. “Hey, Toby. You’re okay,” Alex spoke up after a minute. Tobin nodded her head letting Alex know that she heard her. “I got you kid. We are gonna be okay.”

“I’m sorry Lex,” Her voice was still so small and broken. 

“Nothing to be sorry for babe. You had a bad dream is all.”

“Thank you,” was all she could muster up to say. She was exhausted emotionally from the ordeal she had just gone through. All she wanted to do was go back to sleep in Alex’s arms.

“Do you need me to get you anything?” Alex offered. She wasn’t sure what to do, but she knew she would so anything to make Tobin feel better. 

“Can you just lay here with me? I am still tired, but I don’t really want to fall back asleep. I’m scared.”

Alex got better situated and pulled Tobin in closer. “I can absolutely do that. You scared me too, but you made it through.”

“I should talk about what happened. I want to. Just not right now.”

“Whenever you’re ready babe I’ll be here to listen and talk it out with you. I’m not going anywhere.” 

“Thank you Lex.”

Alex turned the TV on and they found an old movie to watch. They laid like that for a while until Alex felt Tobin’s breathing even out. She held her own breath for a moment hoping that this sleep would be better than the last. Praying that the nightmare was a one-time thing. She would do anything to make sure it never came back.


	6. Remembering Pt. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am super sorry about how spacey these are. College is rough. This isn't the complete story, in fact its a bit of a cliffhanger. However, it is something. I'm in the middle of the next chapter right now. Yes the next chapter finishes the Remembering section. Hopefully I can finish that up when I am supposed to be in study hall on this "vaca" a.k.a Nationals. Much love.

The doctors released Tobin three days later with her promising to be as sedentary as possible for at least a week. She had a follow up appointment in six days so the doctors could check on her still healing ribs and do more blood work. She hated the needles and the blood work, but knew it was necessary because of the drugs she was given. She hadn’t told Alex, but she was remembering more and more of what happened that night every day. She felt bad about keeping it from her, but she didn’t know which would feel worse: telling Alex what he had done or just lying about it and saying she didn’t know. The doctors and police investigators on her case knew. They had run tests on her after she had first came in, but she didn’t let them discus those things with Alex in the room. The younger girls already shouldered so much of the blame for what had happened that night. The Heath’s knew of course. They were in the room when the doctors told Tobin the results of the test they ran and when the police explained what they found when they found her. 

The day she was released felt like Christmas to her. Alex had brought her favorite pair of joggers and her UNC hoodie from their apartment. Putting on the hoodie was harder than she imagined it would be, but Alex was patient and helpful in her struggle. They loaded up the car and headed back home. Alex took the quickest route home not thinking about the fact that the bar Tobin had gone to that night was on the way home. When Tobin saw it her heart dropped to her stomach as she remembered more and more from that night she went missing. After a minute Alex noticed something was wrong.  
“Toby, you okay?” she asked in a soft tone.

Tobin let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding, “yeah, just the bar.” She didn’t need to explain any more. Alex realized what was happening. 

“Are you remembering more from that night?” this was the first time they had talked about it since they day they kissed. 

“Yeah. Actually, Lex, there is something I need to tell you,” she started. Alex reached over and grabbed her hand, hearing the struggle in her voice. 

 

“How about we get you all settled and comfy at home and then we can talk about it. Okay?”

“Yeah, that sounds nice,” Tobin agreed squeezing the younger girl’s hand. 

 

They got home and Alex helped Tobin up the stairs and into their apartment. She helped her go to the bathroom and then got her settled on the couch. She was told to sleep slightly up right for a few more days until the rest of the pain in her ribs went away. So she would be sleeping on the couch. While Tobin was getting comfortable Alex was making her some lunch. Tobin’s go to comport food was grilled cheese, so Alex got to work on a grilled cheese. Tobin turned on the TV to try and get some kind of background noise going. She hated the silence. It reminded her too much of the hospital. 

Alex came back into the living room a few minutes later and handed Tobin her food and the medication she still needed to take for a few fays. “I want to know everything you remember, but I don’t want to push you. So whenever you are ready I will be here ready to listen.” 

“Can we just sit for a few minutes? Maybe watch an old game?”

“Of course, which one do you want to watch,” they had copies of all the old USWNT games and the Thorns games.

“2012 Olympic Semis,” Tobin liked to watch that one over and over because of how close it was. 

“You sure? Even though it’s been 3 years you still get anxious when you watch it.”

“Yeah. I like that one.”

“Alright, whatever you want,” Alex chuckled as she got the game ready to play. 

They sat there for a little while, Tobin ate her food, and Alex played with her hair when she was done. The younger girls patiently waited to hear what all Tobin could remember. After about 30 minutes Tobin finally spoke up, “I remember almost everything.”

“What do you mean almost?”

“I remember everything except how I got to the Hospital. Parts of it are blurry, and others are very vivid.” 

“Okay, well start where you left off last time we talked about it.” 

 

Flashback 

Tobin went down to the bar on the street and immediately ordered two shots of tequila. She was already starting to blame herself for what happened. If she had given Alex what she wanted she would be much happier right now. She wouldn’t have walked down to the bar in the slowly starting rain. She wouldn’t be sitting on a bar stool surrounded in smoke and the smell of sweaty men. The bar wasn’t the nicest, but it was the closest. She sat and she drank. She would talk to the bar tender from time to time as he would bring her more drinks. He seemed like an all right guy. Sleazy men would walk up to her from time to time and try to talk to her. If the bartender noticed he would shoo them away. What neither of them noticed was the man in the corner slowly sipping a beer as he watched Tobin from the moment she walked in. 

After about an hour Tobin’s phone rang. She didn’t even look at it. She turned it off and stuck it in her jacket pocket. She figured it was Alex and she really didn’t want to talk to her right now. She was starting to get drunk and she knew she would do something she would regret if she answered that phone. So she sat and she drank and she watched Sports Center on the TV in the corner of the bar. She brushed off disgusting drunks and told the bartender about some of her problems. 

After a few more hours, the man in the corner finally came up to talk to her. Even in her drunken state, Tobin knew there was something off about him. 

However, he wasn’t slurring his words and immediately trying to get in her pants. He just sat next to her and said he recognized her from somewhere. After a   
minute or two of thinking he figured it out, “you play for the Thorns! I knew I had seen you somewhere. I’ve been to a couple games with friends and I see your picture outside the stadium when I drive by.” 

“Yeah, I play for them. They probably wouldn’t like to see me like this,” she slurred out and chuckled. 

The man kept up the friendly conversation for a while. He still seemed off, but by this time Tobin could hardly see straight and was in no position to judge anyone’s character. In her intoxication she had told both the bartender and the strange man about her night and past with Alex. She thinks the man’s name is John; at least that is what she is almost sure he said. 

Tobin looked up at a clock and saw it was almost 3 in the morning. She figures Alex would be asleep by now and she might be able to sneak back in. “Well, I better get home. It is kind of late and I know that if she wakes up and I am not there she will be even more upset,” she said as she started to stand. 

“Let me give you a ride home,” John, said reaching for her as she stumbled. 

“No. It’s okay. I just live around the corner I can walk.” 

Tobin walked out the door and started to walk home. Neither her nor the bartender noticed John follow her out a few moments later. He got in his car and followed her as she stumbled in the direction of her apartment. She never noticed. He parked the car when she got to her apartment building and followed her up the stairs. When Tobin was fumbling with her keys in her drunkenness, he grabbed her from behind and stuck a syringe in her neck. Tobin was already so foggy from the alcohol she didn’t even register what was happening. 

The next thing Tobin remembers is waking up in a strange place. She was on a bed, but it wasn’t her bed. She tried to get up, but she was tied down. Everything starts to become clearer as she realizes what is going on. Her head is pounding and her heart is racing. She feels like she is going to vomit but knows she can’t sit up so tries to hold it down. She tries to get a better grip on where she is. She assess her body first and then her surroundings. All her clothes are on except for her shoes. She is obviously in a house because the bedroom she is in is decorated and warm. There is a window, but she cannot see out of it from where she is. She struggles against her restraints trying to see how strong they are. She can’t get them to budge. She starts to panic. “Clam down Tobin,” she tries to tell herself, “Panicking will get you nowhere. Alex will realize you never came home when she wakes up. She will look for you.” A minute later she hears the door to the room start to open. She strains to see who it is. A man backs in the room. He is obviously carrying something. When he turns around Tobin recognizes him from the bar. It’s the guy who offered her a ride home. She suddenly remembers he walk home and being grabbed. “What do you want?”

“Oh good you’re up. It’s the middle of the afternoon. Why are you sleeping in so much dear?” Tobin could tell something was off with him. 

“Who are you?”

“Baby don’t you remember me? It doesn’t matter. Does your head hurt? I brought you some aspirin and some breakfast.”

He untied her restraints and moved them so she could sit up and eat. Reluctantly she took the food and medicine. She figured she was no good to herself starved and with a pounding head ache. She ate and he watched her. After a little while her head got fuzzy again. “The room is spinning. What is going on?” she asked 

“I’m sure you are just tired. Get some rest sweetheart. I have a lot planned for you when you wake up.”


	7. Going Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, sorry about the wait. Don't get too mad, I have a plan. Much love.

Flashback

When Tobin started to come around again she noticed something horrifying. She wasn’t wearing any clothes. She looked around and saw that she was still in the same room with her hands still tied up. She feared the worst, but she didn’t know. She knew she was drugged and the man that took her was deranged. She heard footsteps in the hallway a prepared for the worst. 

“Oh good you’re awake,” John said as he entered the room. “I hope you’re well rested.” He sauntered over to the bed. Slowly removing his clothes never losing eye contact with Tobin. “I wanted to do this sooner, but I figured you would want to remember our first time. The time that may bring us our beautiful future child. Baby, I’m ready to start a family with you.” He was finally at the bed. 

“No, please don’t,” Tobin choked out as tears began to fall. She knew she couldn’t stop this and that what was about to happen would change her life forever. 

“Why baby? I thought you wanted this. I thought you wanted to start a family with me sweetheart.” He kept rambling like this for a few moments until Tobin was silently crying. “Lets make a family baby.” 

Tobin watched him finish walking over to her and climb on top of her. She waited for the inevitable to happen. She closed her eyes, not wanting to watch the horrible thing she knew was happening to her. 

 

End Flashback

“Toby,” Alex choked out as she held the girl close. She hadn’t realized exactly what had happened to her best friend. She knew she was hurt badly, but not how badly. “Tobin?” she asked waiting on the girl to look up. When she did she asked in a quiet, concerned voice, “May I kiss you?” The older girl thought for a moment and nodded slowly. “Ok, let me know if you need me to stop.” Alex kissed Tobin soft and sweet. She was doing everything she could to try and let Tobin know that she was safe now. She was trying to convey as much and comfort as she could in one kiss. After a moment she pulled away. Tobin was crying. “Are you okay?” 

“Yeah,” Tobin responded. “Thank you Alex. For everything.” Tobin finally relaxed. She leaned into Alex and let the younger girl hold her while she sobbed silently. She fell asleep like that after a few moments. Alex laid her on the couch and covered her up. She let Tobin sleep.

 

While Tobin slept, Alex cleaned up their apartment. She hadn’t had the chance to since Tobin had gone missing. She had spent all her time either looking for her or at the hospital with her. She got it all clean including Tobin’s room. She washed Tobin’s sheets so they would smell clean and like home. 

Tobin slept for about 6 hours before finally stirring awake. By then Alex had finished cleaning and was watching Netflix on the other couch. “Lex,” Tobin croaked out. 

“Hey, Toby. How ya feelin?”

“Thirsty. Hungry.”

“Well then, lets get you some food. What do you want?”

“Fries. Good fries. Those hospital fries sucked. And ice cream.”

“Then that is what you will have. I’ll go get you some food. You stay here and rest please. I cleaned up the apartment including your sheets and laundry while you were asleep. I’ll be back soon babe.”

“Okay, I’ll be sure to trash the place in the half hour you will be gone,” they both laughed for a moment. Tobin was back. She was back and she was safe and that is all that mattered to Alex. 

“Don’t you dare Tobin Powell Heath,” Alex jokingly scolded her. Tobin stood up from the couch and walked over to Alex, as she was about to leave. Tobin stopped her and leaned in. She gave her a quick kiss then backed away.

“Hurry back,” she said as she smiled. Alex hurried out the door and down to the car. She was going to get back to Tobin as quick as possible, “but drive safe!”

 

Alex made it back in 20 minutes. When she walked in Tobin was curled up in Alex’s UCal hoodie on the couch. “I know you’ve been gone a while, but that is still my hoodie,” Alex said setting the food on the coffee table. 

“It smells like you,” Tobin responded. “I feel safer when I am close to you.”

“Well good news, I am not going anywhere. At least not anywhere for long. It is also a good thing I accidentally washed your sheets in my detergent.”

“Actually,” Tobin started but paused and dipped her head slightly embarrassed; “I was hoping I could sleep with you tonight.” She looked up to see a shocked look on Alex’s face. “I just   
mean sleep in the bed with you,” she babbled out. 

“I know Toby,” Alex chuckled at her babbling. “Yes you can sleep with me. To be honest I never want to let you out of my sight again.”

“That is fine by me.”

The girls talked and ate and binge watched Netflix until Tobin was finally ready for bed. Alex had been tired for hours. Tobin had offered to go to bed when Alex first started yawning, but she knew Tobin would just sit there awake for hours and she didn’t want that. So she pushed herself and stayed up. 

When Tobin was finally ready for bed, they both changed and curled up next to each other. Alex held Tobin tight and they both drifted off to sleep to the sound of each other’s peaceful breathing.


	8. The Perfect Week

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What up fam? I have had some time off, so I am trying to write as much as I can. I may not post everything I get done here over this break right away, but hopefully I will have a good amount stored up to post in a more timely than normal fashion. Much Love.

The next day both of the girls slept in. Tobin woke first. Her late, long nap helped rejuvenate her quicker than Alex. She smiled as she looked at the beautiful girl sleeping next to her and was happier than she had ever been. She slowly and quietly got up and went to the bathroom. She decided to make Alex breakfast as a start to the many thank-yous she owed the girl. She made her breakfast, which included pancakes, eggs, bacon, and coffee. She got it all set up and brought it to the girl in bed. 

She set everything up in the living room and went to wake Alex. She walked into the room and over to the bed they had both shared the night before. Tobin leaned down next to Alex and gave her a soft sweet kiss. Alex started to stir awake and smiled when she opened her eyes to see Tobin standing there. “Well that is the best way to wake up.”

“Yes it is. Now, I don’t mean to rush you, but I’ve made breakfast and you don’t want it to get cold.”

“You made me breakfast? What did I do to deserve this?”

“I did, and I got Fuller House all set up on Netflix. You never left my side in the hospital and you have been great these past few weeks. I owe you much more than breakfast.” 

“Tobin, I am the reason that you went out that night. I am the reason you were in that bar. Being with you while you recovered was the least I could do.”

“It’s over now. I am home and safe, and as long as I can this,” she paused to lean in and kiss Alex again, “then I am happy.”

“Hmmm, you can do that whenever you want babe,” Alex hummed out before kissing Tobin again. 

“Alright, lets go eat. Breakfast that is,” Tobin winked as she led Alex into the living room. 

“This looks really good Toby.”

“Only the best for you.”

The girls finished breakfast and cleaned up the dishes. They spent the day cuddled up on the couch. Sharing small sweet kisses in between episodes. Their breakfast was a late one, so they just snacked for lunch. When Tobin finally decided she wanted dinner they ordered a pizza and she ate half of it by herself. “How can you eat half a large pizza by yourself?” Alex asked barely able to get two pieces down.

“I was hungry.”

Alex laughed at her as she finished off her drink. “When do you want to go to bed love?” she asked knowing Tobin must be tired even if it was a lazy day. 

“I dunno. Probably soon. I’m getting kind of tired.”

“I figured as much. Are you in any pain?” 

“I’m fine for now, but I will probably take some meds before bed. Tossing and turning starts to hurt after a while,” Tobin replied. She was telling the truth this time. She wasn’t in pain at the moment, but there had been several times during the day that she lied because she didn’t want to worry Alex. Tobin’s ribs throbbed when she laughed too much, or they laid a certain way too long. 

“Okay Toby, I’m going to bed soon. I have to go back to training tomorrow.”

“Oh yeah, I forgot about our life outside of this apartment. Lets go to bed. We have a long day ahead of us.”

The girls once again got ready for bed and climbed into Alex’s bed. Tobin had taken her pain meds and was ready to cuddle up next to Alex. “Tobin,” Alex started sounding concerned, “will things change now that we have to go back to our lives?”

“I hope not. I really like kissing you and I’d like to keep doing it if that is okay with you.” 

Alex smiled at her response,” I’d like that too,” she finished off her response with a kiss. 

 

The next day Tobin and Alex woke and went to work. Alex had training, and even though Tobin couldn’t train yet she went with her. The team was excited to see Tobin again, even if it was just to watch training. The doctors sidelined her for the time being. There was not much of a timetable for her return because her injuries are varying. She watched as the team practiced, and gave any input she had. 

“Glad you’re back Tobs, missed that brilliant mind of yours out here,” Allie Long told her during a water break. 

“Missed you too Harry.”

Their week went like this. Going to bed together, waking up, going to training, coming home, cooking dinner, and going to bed again. It was a peaceful week. There was a routine and both girls liked that. They decided to spend their Sunday off at the end of the week like they did last week. They planned to sleep in and spend the day watching Netflix once they woke up. One thing got in the way of that.

Tobin woke up suddenly with a nauseous feeling in her stomach. She tried to ignore it and go back to sleep. 10 minutes later she was back up again with a worse feeling than before. She got   
up, sprinted to the bathroom and emptied anything she had left in her stomach from the night before. She leaned back against the wall across from the toilet and tried to catch her breath. Just as she thought she could get up, another wave hit her and she was back over the toilet. 

“Toby?” came a sleepy voice from the door.

“Did I wake you? I’m sorry Lex.”

“It’s okay. Are you okay?” Alex’s voice had gone from tired to concerned quickly.

“Yeah, I think I’m okay. Just ate something bad probably.”

“Tobin, we had the same things yesterday.”

“Then it is probably all the drugs that have been in and out of my system recently,” she really wasn’t sure what was going on, but she didn’t want Alex to worry.

“You’re probably right. Here,” Alex got her a cool damp washcloth, “I’ll go get you something to settle your stomach.”

Alex went to find her something easy on her stomach to eat and a glass of water. She knew Tobin wouldn’t want her to worry, but she always did these days. Just the slightest look of discomfort on Tobin’s face made Alex worried. 

Tobin did her best to clean herself up and look better before going out to be with Alex. She started to think about the many different possibilities for her sudden sickness. She could think of a few things. One of them that would especially upset Alex. She decided not to think about that, but instead to take Alex out on a date to thank her for everything she has done. She hoped to see just where this new and comfortable thing between them is going.


	9. Date?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo, sorry about life fam. I have been going through some stuff and had to prioritize. Anyway, hopefully my life is calming down some (fingers crossed0 and I will be able to do more. This is kind of just a fluffy filler to get ya through. Much love.

“Alex, can I ask you something?” Tobin started nervously. She was feeling far better than she had earlier that morning. She had eaten a small breakfast and drank some water. They had been sitting on the couch in a comfortable silence. Tobin was using the time to work up the courage for what she was about to do.

“Yeah sure Toby.”

“Can I take you out on a date?” Alex didn’t respond right away. She just stared at Tobin, which caused the girl to panic. “I’m sorry,” Tobin started to stumble out.

“Wait,” Alex grabbed her face to calm her down. She looked at her in the eyes for a moment and then answered her; “I would love it if you took me on a date.”

“Yeah? How about tomorrow?”

“Would you be feeling up for it after this morning?” 

“Yeah! I’m already feeling better, and I don’t plan on doing anything to fancy, just a causal dinner somewhere other than a fast food place or here, and maybe a movie, or a walk, or whatever.”

“Then tomorrow it is. I can’t wait,” Alex looked calm on the outside, but inside she was screaming like a little girl at a Shawn Mendez concert. Tobin had finally asked her on a date. Does this mean that the past week meant to her what it did to Alex? Alex spent the rest of the day grinning like an idiot at the girl next to her. Her best friend and the girl she was in love with. 

They stayed on the couch for a while. Just watching Netflix while Tobin dozed in and out of sleep. The sickness earlier had worn her out. She was in a great deal of pain in her ribs as well and had taken some of her pain pills. They made her drowsy. 

Tobin had finally fallen asleep so Alex decided to get up and make sure the apartment was clean. After that she checked the kitchen to see what groceries they had. She made a list and decided to go to the store because it was a short one. She left Tobin a note and ran out. 

Alex returned about an hour later to a still sleeping Tobin. She made sure to grab some stuff to settle Tobin’s stomach should the sickness return. She also grabbed them both burgers for lunch. She put the groceries away quickly and went over to Tobin in the living room. She leaned down and kissed Tobin on the cheek before gently shaking her awake. “Hey sleepy head,” she cooed as Tobin’s eyes slowly opened. “I brought you some food.”

“You left?”

“Yes and I left you a note in case you woke up before I got back, but obviously you didn’t,” Alex chuckled at the confused girl.

“It was a nice nap. What did you get?” Tobin was feeling much better than this morning and food sounded fantastic. 

“I got us some burgers and fries, and I went to the store and got a few things just in case you got sick again.”

“You’re the best,” Tobin smiled sleepily at her. She had sat up, but was still rubbing the sleep from her eyes. 

They finished their day out as planned with Netflix and just spending time together. Both girls were excited about the following day and the date that Tobin was planning. They fell asleep in each other’s arms just as they had every night since Tobin had been home. 

 

Unfortunately their day started the same as the previous one. Alex woke to Tobin in the bathroom and immediately went to work on making sure she was okay and that she got cleaned up. She started to worry. Tobin never got sick. This was now two days in a row of Tobin waking up horribly sick. Alex was glad she had thought to pick up more sprite and bread for Tobin. After Tobin was settled she insisted that Alex go to training. She wasn’t sure if she herself should go, but Alex needed to go. Reluctantly, Alex left. She promised to be back as soon as training was over and told Tobin to call the team manager if she needed anything and she would come right home. While Tobin appreciated the gesture, she knew she wouldn’t call her. Tobin was determined to get through this day. She had a date to plan and go on. 

She decided to take a nap for a little while to try and recuperate from the morning’s events. After her nap Tobin planned their date. She knew it couldn’t be anything too taxing or Alex would shut it down with Tobin being sick. She decided on something simple. Dinner and a walk through the park. Now she just had to decide where to go for dinner. She spent 45 minutes going back and forth between Chili’s and IHOP. In the end she decided to flip a coin. The plans were set. Chili’s and a nice walk. She just hoped she didn’t get sick again. She knew that if it went on another day, she knew Alex would make her go to a doctor. 

Tobin had another hour before Alex would be home and she was bored out of her mind. She decided to clean up the apartment. There was not a whole lot of that to do either since Alex had just done it the day before. She still wasn’t allowed to do much and that was starting to make her stir crazy with Alex not around to keep her occupied. She thought she was going to combust from boredom when Alex came walking through the door.

“You’re home!!” Tobin yelled like a puppy the second she saw Alex.

“Well someone missed me,” Alex chuckled at her. “Feeling better?”

“Loads.”

“I can see that. what have you been up to?”

“Planning our date tonight.”

“Alex paused for a second, “Toby should we still go? Are you feeling up for it?”

“Lex, I feel fine. And I have been looking forward to this all day. So we are going.” 

“Okay, okay. Are you going to tell me what we are doing so I know what to wear?”

“Dinner and a walk. So something casual and comfy. Jean shorts and a tank would be fine.”

“Alright, I’ll go shower real quick.” 

Tobin bounced up and down with anticipation the entire time Alex was getting ready. She was nervous, but had it planned out almost perfectly. She was going to take her to a casual dinner and then on a nice walk through their favorite part of the park. After they walked for a little bit she would stop Alex and kiss her. She would watch the younger girl’s eyes light up before kissing her again. Then she would keep walking. They would walk to get coffee. Once they had their coffee she would ask Alex to be her girlfriend. It all seemed so perfect. She was nervous, but so ready for this beautiful girl she had fallen in love with to be hers.


	10. Date!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all, I am so so sorry. Life has been a bit of a mess lately. So here is a nicer chapter. I promise I have a plan, but like and college are winning at the moment. Much love.

They had gotten ready and were heading out to dinner when Alex stopped Tobin, “Are you sure you are up for this? You have been so sick the past two mornings.  
“I am beyond ready for this date. I know I have been sick, but I feel better now. I promise,” Tobin finished with a cheesy grin. She was not going to let anything stand in her way tonight. She has the date all planned out and she was going to whatever she had to do to make it perfect. 

They headed out to dinner. Nothing too big. Just a casual dinner at their favorite local restaurant. The only thing that separated this time from any other was that Alex did not keep Tobin from buying both of their dinners tonight. It was a shared special moment between the two when the waitress asked if the ticket would be split and Tobin said no without any interruption. She looked over at the younger girl and smiled. Until that moment Tobin had been nervous and jittery and Alex could tell. She thought it was cute. Tobin payed the bill and they went down to the park. They lived within walking distance of just about anywhere they needed to go. 

Alex slipped her hand in Tobin’s as they walked through the park. Tobin led them all over the place. She was trying to get up the nerve to ask Alex to be her girlfriend. She was starting to get jittery again. She knew it needed to happen soon or she would freak out and not do it. When she got to a good place near the pond she stopped them both. She took Alex’s other hand in hers and looked her straight in the eyes.

“Alex,” she started with a big breath as she started too look all over the place again. “Alex, I know the past few weeks haven’t been easy and I have been a mess, but you stuck with me through it. What happened made me realize that if we want something we have to go after it while we have the chance. So, Alex, will you be my girlfriend?” she finally brought her eyes back to Alex’s long enough to ask the question and then got nervous and dropped her head again.

“Tobin,” Alex said as she lifter the older girl’s chin up, “I would love nothing more than to be your girlfriend.” Tobin looked her in the eyes once more and smiled bigger than she ever had before. Alex chuckled at how cute she was. “Was that why you wanted to go on this date so badly?”

“Yeah, I wanted to ask you and I wanted it to be a little special.”

“You didn’t need to do that. I would have said yes if we were sitting at home in out PJs, but it was very special. I have been waiting so long for you to ask me that. What took you so long?”

“I was always scared you would say no, but after everything and the kiss in the hospital and the past week. I figured it was worth the risk. And I was so right. I have liked you since the second I saw you, and I knew I wanted you in my life in any way I could have you. I was willing to live out that with you as my best friend, but now I have you as my girlfriend. Even though it has only been 30 seconds, it has been the best 30 seconds of my life.”

“You’re cute when you ramble did you know that?” They started walking again. Hand in hand and both with the goofiest grins on their faces. They both knew this was going to be one of the best choices they had ever made. 

 

As they waked the smell of fried food flooded the air, and while Alex enjoyed it Tobin felt sick to her stomach. It only reminded her of what she had been thinking about earlier that day. Now all she could feel was guilt. What if she was right and she had just put Alex into an impossible situation. Would Alex still want to be with her? Would this wreck not only the new relationship but years of friendship? 

Alex could see Tobin was thinking about something, “Toby, what’s wrong?”

“Oh nothing.”

“I don’t believe you. You have that faraway look in your eyes.” 

“I was just thinking about something random. We can talk about it later. Let’s just enjoy our date. It isn’t over yet. I still have ice creamed planned.”

“Okay love. Whatever you want.” 

 

After ice cream and another 45 minutes of walking around the park talking and laughing, the two girls walked home. As they walked Tobin decided she needed to tell Alex her theory as to why she has been sick the past couple of days. They get back to their apartment and both go sit on the couch. “What do you want to watch?” Alex asked as she grabbed the remote and sat on the couch. 

“Actually I wanted to talk to you about something,” Tobin started as she sat down. “I wanted to talk to you about what I was thinking about earlier. I think I know why I have been getting sick.”

“Okay, well whatever it is I’m sure we can handle it.”

“That’s just it. If I am right then I have just put you in a horrible situation.”

“Tobin, whatever it is, I am here for. Okay? More so if it is something that happened because of me.”  
“I think all the drugs I have been given the past month have wrecked my body and I am going through withdrawal. Which means I could be addicted. And I don’t want to put you through that. I’ve been sensitive to smells too these past few days. I didn’t want to tell you and I honestly forgot about it for a little bit until I could smell all that greasy food. I go to the doctor in a few days to check in, I will ask him about it.”

“Oh Toby, we can handle that kid. We can get you through that with a little hard work. Me, you, your family, our teams, and everyone else you love. We got you Tobs.”  
Tobin smiled at the younger girl and suddenly she felt safe. She felt like she could conquer whatever it is that life was going to throw at her. She had a beautiful girl by her side and all of the love and support she could ever need. She was ready to take on anything. And she was ready for bed. She and Alex walked back to there now basically shared room, got ready for bed, climbed in, and Alex held Tobin as she drifted off in to a the best sleep she’d had in weeks.


	11. Doctor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! its been a while again I know. Super sorry. Hope you enjoy. Much love.

Tobin’s day started just how it had the past few days she woke up with a retching feeling in her stomach and shot out of bed. Alex followed her into the bathroom like she had the past few days. When Tobin took a break and leaned back, Alex held her and pulled her hair out of her now sweaty face. “Babe, I think we need to go to a doctor,” She told Tobin as she held her a little longer.

Before Tobin could answer, another wave hit her and she was back over the toilet. When she finally emptied her stomach completely she agreed with Alex. She was not getting any better and she needed to get this figured out so she could at least go watch training. Alex wouldn’t let her out of the house when she was like this. 

They called the doctor that treated Tobin while she was in the hospital and made an appointment for later that afternoon. Alex had training, but ever since the whole issue began she was given special permission to miss the technical and tactical parts of the day to take care of Tobin. She went to practice while Tobin stayed home and got some rest. She cam home about an hour before the appointment to make sure Tobin was ready. Tobin was dressed and sitting at the kitchen table when she walked in. Alex saw her sitting there and new she was so far in her head that not much would be able to bring her back. She walked in and kissed her on the cheek. “Baby, what are you thinking?” Alex asked her. 

“What if it is something bad Alex? Something horrible that I have to live with for the rest of my life?”

“Then we will live with it together. We will get through it together. I will be right here by your side Tobs.”

Tobin stood up and hugged Alex. She felt safe in her arms. “Okay. Okay.”

They left and headed to the doctor. Tobin was still shaking and scared, but Alex held her hand while they waited. Finally the doctor came to get them, “Hey Tobin, I hear you are getting sick in the mornings. What do you say we figure out why that is and try to fix it?”

“Yeah Doc, that sounds great.”

“Well there are a few blood tests I want to run. How about I draw some blood for the tests and then I can explain which ones I did and why?”

“Yeah, yeah whatever you think Doc. You got me back on my feet in the first place.”

The Doctor chuckled, “well thank you Tobin, but it was mostly your will power and Alex here who never left your side. I did all the medical stuff, and you did the hard part.”

“Yeah she has been pretty great. Speaking of, can she stay with me through this whole process?”

“Yeah of course. As long as you want her in the room she can stay.” A few moments later, as the doctor tried to get completely caught up on what has been happening with Tobin and how she has been healing other than getting sick, a nurse came in a drew some blood. After she left the Doctor turned to Tobin and started going over all the tests. “I had her take samples for several different tests. Some of those were to see how the inside parts of you are healing, and the others were to try and figure out what is going on to make you so sick. I’ll be honest with you, this will be hard to hear, but I’m going to tell you what they are now so you have an idea of what could happen. That does not mean that it is what is going to come up in the test. It could be something simple, but I just want you to be prepared. Okay?”

Tobin took a minute to register all of the new information. She looked at Alex who nodded back at her, “yeah Doc, okay. Hit me with it.”

“Well, the tests include a drug test, several STD tests, and a pregnancy test.”

“A pregnancy test? Wouldn’t you have done that when I was in the hospital to begin with, what with the situation and all?”

“Normally yes, but with the amount of drugs that were in your system it was highly unlikely that any viable conception would not have survived, so after one negative test we stopped running that test. However, sometimes we are wrong and false negatives happen that is why we are running it today. The ones to determine what is wrong should all come back within a half hour if you’d like to wait here, but the other ones will take a little longer and I will call you.”

“We will stay here, if that’s okay with you Lex?” Tobin said as she turned to look at Alex again.

“Yeah Tobs, we can stay as long as you want to.” She smiled at Tobin reassuringly. Tobin grabbed her hand. She needed that physical reassurance that she was really there. 

“Alright, I have to check on other patients, but if you need me just have a nurse page me and ill be here. I put a rush on your tests, and I will be back as soon as I can with the results. Don’t think about the possibilities too much, I just wanted you to be prepared. That doesn’t mean things will be real.” 

“Thanks Doc,” Tobin said as the doctor walked out. “Alex,” she started fully turning her body towards the girl next to her, “listen, I know this is a lot to take in. this is a lot for me to take in. I want you to know that if one of those tests comes back positive and you don’t want to keep doing this that is okay. I understand. I want you to know that you have an out and you don’t have to feel bad about it. Especially if umm… if I’m…” she couldn’t finish that last part.

“Tobin, breathe. It’s going to be okay. I’m sure everything is perfectly fine. We can figure the rest out as we get answers, okay?”

“Okay,” Tobin said with a shaky breath, “Thank you.” 

They sat in silence a while longer before the doctor came back t tell them the news. They heard a knock on the door as he came back in to give them the news. “Okay Tobin, I have the results. Now I will say that some of it is good, and the rest of if depends on how you take it.” He sat on the stool in the room and gave them a moment to respond.

“Okay Doc, lay it on me.”

“Well the good news is, the STD tests all came back negative, which is good. However, I do suggest coming back and getting tested for them again in a few months just to make sure. Some of them don’t become prominent right away.”

“That’s good at least. What about the rest of it?”

“The drug test came back clean so I don’t think you have anything to worry about there.” The doctor paused and looked at Tobin who looked like she was figuring out what he was going to say next. “Tobin, the one test that did come back positive was the pregnancy test. You’re pregnant.”


	12. Pregnant?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey fam, I am on a bit of a vacation and will have tons of time to write so hopefully I can get a few don. I will however be trying to make them longer, so it may be a bit. But i got this done yesterday and decided you guys deserve a new one quickly. Much love.

“Tobin you’re pregnant,” the doctor repeated again after Tobin did not show sing of an answer. “Tobin?”

“Tobs,” Alex starts, “are you okay?” she was more concerned about her girlfriend than about the news they both just received. 

“Okay Tobin, I know this is a lot to take in. I am going to go over a few things with you and Alex, and then I am going to leave this packet of information that is basically what I am going to tell you with the two of you. You can stay in here as long as you need, and if you have any questions you can always, call, text, or email.”

“That sounds good, thank you Doc,” Alex replies knowing Tobin wont be able to yet.

“Well, Tobin you do have options. I know that this is not exactly a wanted situation, so if you wanted to terminate”

“No.” Tobin finally spoke up, “I’m not doing that. I understand that it is an option, but it is not an option for me. Circumstance doesn’t matter.” 

“Okay, that is perfectly fine. Personally I don’t like the option, but I have to inform women of their rights.”

“This,” Tobin started again. “This may not have been planned, but it is here now and I’m not going erase it. I’m not going to end a life just because I wasn’t planning on it being started.” Alex started to tear up. This beautiful woman that she had fallen in love with was making her fall more and more in love. 

“Alright, then I will set you up with prenatal vitamins, and I’m sure an OB will want to monitor you more carefully for a while given the circumstances. They will be able to determine more your due date, but my guess is you are about 5 weeks. I say that because it’s been about 5 weeks since we’ve found you. So I should warn you that they wont be able to see much, and they may not be able to hear a heartbeat yet.”

“Okay Doc,” Tobin responded. Thank you for everything.”

“You’re welcome. I’ll call you later this week with the results of the other tests, but I think those will be just fine. I’ll leave you these information packets. Take your time leaving if you need,” with this the doctor left the two of them in the room alone to think. 

 

 

They stayed in the room for about 20 minutes. Five of them were in silence until Alex spoke up, “Tobin, are you okay?”

“I don’t know. I didn’t think this was actually going to be what happened. And I don’t know how I feel about it. I meant what I said. I’m not going to… to… you know.”

“Yeah baby, I know. And that is okay. Okay? You’re healthy. We don’t need to think about it right this second. How about we get you home and rest okay?”

“Yeah I’d like that, but can we sit her a few more minutes. I need to figure out one thing. How am I going to tell my parents?”

They stayed there trying to figure that out for a little while longer. Eventually they decided it could wait until they had had a good meal and a good nights rest. Alex already felt more protective over Tobin since the incident, and now she would do anything to make sure she is safe and comfortable. While Tobin was trying to stay calm and figure out exactly what this all means, Alex was thinking about all the things she needed to get to make sure Tobin stayed healthy.

 

They got in the car and headed home, “What do you want to eat babe?” Alex asked as she drove in the direction of home. 

“I don’t think I’m hungry,” Tobin replied quietly.

“Tobin, love, you have to eat,” Alex started. “I know it’s a lot to take in, but you need nutrients now more than ever.”

“Okay, you’re right,” Tobin knew she was right and didn’t want to fight Alex on it. “Is pizza okay?”

“Of course baby. What kind do you want?”

“Can we get one Pep and one Supreme?”

“Sounds great to me,” Alex smiled sweetly at her and put her right hand on Tobin’s in her lap for a moment. She picked up her phone and called it in. She went ahead and had it delivered to the apartment so that Tobin could get changed and comfy. 

5 minutes after they got home the pizza arrived, and Alex brought it and a glass of water to Tobin. “Alex, we need to talk,” Tobin said as she sat down. 

“What about love?”

“About this, about us, about all of this,” the older girl started to babble. “Listen Lex, I have some things to decide pretty soon and I just want you to know that if this is too much for you I understand. I’m going to be making those decisions in the next few days and if after I tell you what they are you don’t want to stay in all of this then that is okay. I don’t want to force you into anything.”

“Tobin, I know this is scary. I’m scared too. I’m scared for you love. But I’m not going anywhere. I understand that this is a lot, but it’s happening. You did nothing to make me want to leave. Thank you for thinking of my feelings in all of this, but don’t worry about me. Worry about you and the, um, the baby.” 

There it was, more than just ‘Tobin you’re pregnant.’ A baby. She was having a baby and that was her reality now. She was in a relationship with the girl she fell in love with years ago, but she was having a rapist’s baby. How did this become her life? “A baby,” Tobin said quietly, “I’m having a baby, and I have no idea what to do about it.” 

“Well, you start by staying calm and taking care of yourself. As and athlete your body is in great condition, but with your recent injuries you need to be careful. Okay?”

“Okay Lex, and thank you for everything.”

“Of course my love.”


	13. Research

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey boo boos, Sorry i suck at life. hope maybe this makes up for it a little. I promise i never forget about you, life is just busy as a 21 year old college athlete who doesn't have her life together. Much love.

The next day Tobin woke up to Alex’s arms wrapped around her. As she looked around their room she noticed the sun shinning through the window. Something felt off. She looked around for her phone to check the time. She saw how late it was and woke Alex in a panic, “Lex! Wake up! You should be at training!”

“Tobin, I told them yesterday that I wouldn’t be in today. Go back to sleep baby.”

“Wait,” Tobin started again, “I didn’t throw up this morning. Not yet at least.”

“Good babe, we need to go get your vitamins today and call to set up an appointment with an OB. Okay?”

“Okay Lex. I can’t sleep though, so I’m going to get up.”

“Okay baby,” Alex said before leaning up for a kiss. Tobin leaned down to kiss her and then slipped out of bed.

Tobin grabbed an orange from the fridge and sat on the couch with her computer. She opened up her laptop and started to make a list of things she needed to do. At the top of her list was finding out if the baby would be okay because it was conceived on drugs. The various things that followed involved information about adoption, athletes coming back from having babies, could a woman love a baby that was conceived through rape, and the last thing to do on her list was to look up the man who did this to her and if he had rights. She was hoping to get this done before Alex got up. She got up and made herself a cup of coffee. As she started her googling venture she remembered something she head once about coffee being bad for unborn babies, and she immediately put the cup down. She added that to her list of things to verify. 

Her first search told her that even though her baby was conceived with a high amount of drugs in her system, as long as she doesn’t do drugs the baby would be fine. While she was reading her articles she found her hand absentmindedly resting over her not yet existing bump. She checked that off of her list and moved onto the next. She spent an hour scouring the Internet trying to answer her questions before Alex woke up. 

The younger girl got out of bed and walked down the hall to where she figure Tobin would be. Tobin was so lost in her thoughts that she didn’t hear the younger girl get up. Alex stopped and watched Tobin for a moment. She admired the older girl as she focused on the computer. She traced over the girl and noticed where her hand had fallen. Alex couldn’t help but imagine what it would be like with Tobin’s bump a little bit bigger and the two of them sitting around watching TV. She started to imagine a whole life with Tobin and this baby that they didn’t expect to be in their lives. Somehow she already felt a love for this child that she wasn’t even sure Tobin would keep. 

“Hey Toby,” Alex said finally making her presence known, “what are you doing?”

“Just trying to figure some things out,” Tobin replies without looking up. She was hyper focused on figuring out all she could. She had gotten through all but one thing. She was staring at the mug shot of the man who did this to her, her baby’s father. She hated him. Just looking at him made her want to throw her laptop across the room. She wasn’t sure what rights he had, but she was going to do everything in her power to make sure he never came near her baby. 

Alex walked over to Tobin; she saw the almost full coffee cup and started to wonder what had so much of her girlfriend’s attention. She sat down next to Tobin and saw the picture of the man on the screen, “Toby, what are you doing?”

“I needed to see his face. I needed to look at him so I know exactly the face that will never ever come near this baby. Alex, this is what he wanted. He is sick and deranged and wanted to get me pregnant. He wanted me to have his baby.”

“Tobin, I don’t think this is a good idea. Maybe we should do something else to distract you from all of this.”

“Lex, I know you are trying to help and I appreciate it, but I need to do this. He wanted me to have this baby, and I will. I will have this baby, but he is never coming near it. Ever. I will do whatever I need to do to keep him out of our lives. Mine, yours, and this baby’s.”

“Okay Toby, Okay. How about you at least take a break and we go find some real breakfast?”

“Yeah, that is a good idea. Thank you babe,” Tobin replied as she put her laptop down. She knew a break would be good for her. She needed to not think about it for a little bit and just relax with her girlfriend before this became too much of a reality. She only had so long before she would start showing. Though she wont say it out loud, she wants to have this baby with Alex. Sure it is super early in their relationship to even think about starting a family and all of that, but it was Tobin’s reality now. She wont force Alex to be in it with her, but she sure hopes Alex will want to join her on this adventure. 

The two girls spent their day off resting and enjoying each other’s company. They decided to start a new series on Netflix for when they had off days. They managed to watch 3 episodes of Gilmore Girls before needing lunch. It was about halfway through the third one when Tobin realized all she had eaten today was an orange. Alex had made her eggs and toast, but the smell of the eggs mad her sick so she didn’t eat any of it. She knew she needed to eat better and that they needed to call and find a Doctor to get set up with. Alex ordered them a pizza online when she heard Tobin’s stomach growl about the time Tobin herself realized she was hungry. When the episode ended they paused their marathon and decided to find a doctor while they waited on their pizza to get there. 

“So Toby, we need to find you a OB.”

“Yeah I guess we do,” Tobin was not thrilled about this part of the whole thing. She was worried that she would possibly have bad flashbacks and react badly while on the table being examined.

“Hey, I know its not exactly going to be fun, but I will be with you the whole time if you want.”

“Thank you Lex,” Tobin said as she grabbed her laptop and snuggled back into Alex’s side. Before all of this it would be Tobin pulling Alex in to snuggle, but there was a lot more of Alex holding the older girls recently. “Okay, how do we do this?”

“Well, we could ask our moms,” Alex started and then Tobin shot straight up.

“My mom! I haven’t told them about any of this. Crap crap crap!” she started pacing around the room. She had no clue how she was going to tell her mother that the man that raped her got her pregnant.

“Tobin, sweetheart, you need to calm down and breathe please. We can call her right now if you want or we can wait a little while longer. It is not a big deal. Just breathe.” Alex was pleading with Tobin to sit down before she stressed herself out too much. She knew stress would be bad for the baby.

“Okay, you’re right. We can handle that in a bit. First thing on the list is to set up an appointment somewhere and tell coach what is going on. He needs to know.”

“How about this, we sit here and enjoy lunch and stay calm. Then we head to the field, tell coach and the trainers and see if they have a suggestion for a doctor?”

“Wow,” Tobin started as she looked at the younger girl, “you are absolutely amazing. How are you so calm through all of this?” She bent down to kiss the girl as she finished her question. 

“Well babe, I know you have enough to worry about so I am trying to be calm for you.” They both sat back down on the couch and started to look at what Tobin had been researching earlier. Alex saw the list Tobin had made and read over it. “Tobs, are you thinking of giving the baby up for adoption?”

“It was a though earlier, but it would be far too complicated. We may not be movie stars but we are followed by the public so the only way to be able to hide the pregnancy from them would be to never leave the apartment. And I don’t think I could love like that.” She paused for a moment not sure if she should say the rest of what she was thinking. Eventually she decided to, “and I think I’ve already fallen in love with this little human I’m growing. I’ve only known about it for a day and I don’t think I could live without it.”

That confirmed what Alex had been thinking. Tobin was going to keep the baby. This filled the younger girl with hope for a possible future between them and starting a family. 

“Alex,” the older girl said setting her laptop down, “I know this is a lot and I know that you never expected this to happen. I am going to keep this baby because it is what I want to do. I understand if that is not what you want. You have your whole career ahead of you and a whole world to conquer. It would be one thing if one of us got traded and we are just the two of us, but now there is another life involved. I guess what I’m saying is, if you decide you don’t want this I totally understand and I wont force this on you. I will understand if this is too much for you.”

“Oh Tobin,” Alex started to tear up, “yes its a lot and yes its terrifying, but I am not going to leave you because you are having a baby. Even seeing you just now talking about how much you already love him or her mad me fall for you even more. I know this is not how things were supposed to workout, but we are here now and I am read to take this on with you. I am ready to help you in any way you need.” As Alex finished she placed her hand on her girlfriend’s flat stomach. She knew she wouldn’t be able to feel anything, but just the thought that there was another life in there was amazing to her. This beautiful girl that she had fallen for was already the most amazing mother after just 24 hours of knowing she was going to be a mother. This was not how she pictured her life going, but she was ready to face it head on.


	14. It's Real

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What up Fam? I really do always feel horrible about making you wait so long for an update. I swear I don't do this to torture you. College is brutal. Even for those of us who have done it for 3 years now and should have it down. Anyway, I hope this satisfies you for now. I'm working on some more developed ones that help the story move along a little better and fast, but I figured this would at least get you through a little. Many apologies if I am wrong, and as always Much Love.

The next day the girls went to Tobin’s OB appointment that they had set up the previous afternoon. Tobin decided she wanted to wait to tell her family, and anyone really, until they had the sonogram pictures. So they spent the afternoon Google-ing different places and found one they thought would be good for the situation. Luckily they had an opening for the next day at a time where Alex didn’t have to miss training. 

They arrived at Tobin’s 8:30 appointment half an hour early. Tobin was too nervous to sleep, and Alex knew they would have to fill out paperwork. They sat in the waiting room and started filling out medical history forms. Tobin didn’t have answers to half of the questions on the forms and Alex helped all she could, but eventually they had to leave things blank. They would have to explain to the doctor exactly what happened when they go in. Tobin chose a woman when looking for a doctor because she knew she wouldn’t be comfortable with a man down there. 

Just before 8:30 a nurse came out to get them. She took them back and had Tobin weighed and checked her blood pressure and temperature. Because they did blood work at the hospital a few days earlier, they didn’t need to do it again. The nurse left them in a room to wait for the doctor. A few moments of comfortable silence later she came in. 

“Hello, I’m Dr. Jones. You must be Tobin, and you must be Alex,” she said addressing the girls. They were shocked that she new Alex’s name because it wasn’t on the papers. “I could have known that without looking at your chart. I go to all the Thorns’ home games.” The girls chuckled at this comment and breathed sighs of relief. 

“Well after this we are going to have to make sure you get free season tickets,” Tobin stated. She was half joking, but mostly serious as long as the experience went well. 

“I must say,” the doctor started, “I didn’t know you two were together or trying to have a baby. But I am glad you chose to come here.”

“Well Doc,” Tobin replied, “we only recently became a couple, and the baby thing was far from planned. I don’t know if heard about my disappearance and my absence from the team recently?”

“I did know about you not being in the line up recently. Most people notice when you aren’t there,” Dr. Jones replied with a chuckle trying to keep the conversation light. 

“Well, I was kidnapped, attacked, and raped. That lead to me being here,” Tobin told her doing her best to keep calm. “It is all still really new and doesn’t feel real yet, but I just need to know that everything is okay with my baby.” 

“Well I am sorry to hear about all you went through. I will do everything I can for you and your baby, and you too Alex. It seems you are taking all of this very well,” she said that last part as she turned to Alex. “I take my job very seriously and a big part of that is making sure expecting mothers are under as little stress as possible. I know this is not an ideal situation for either of you so I have to play bad cop here and make sure that you are going to do your part in this and make this as stress free as possible.”

“To be honest with you Doc I never expected this to happen to either of us, and when I would day dream years ago about having a family with Tobin it was never her I imagined as the one carrying our children. And as crazy and this sounds because of how short the timing is, I am more than ready to start a family with her.”

“That was just the answer I was looking for. Well, not really. I was just looking for you to say you will do whatever it takes to keep them both healthy, but I will take that answer.” 

Tobin turned to Alex and smiled with tears in her eyes, “You really day dreamed about us?”

“Of course I did you nerd. When I first showed up to camp you quickly became my best friend, and as that friendship grew I saw myself growing old with you and having a family. Not quite like this, but I’ll take it.”

“Alright,” Dr. Jones interrupted, “lets get this started and see if we can see anything. Tobin can you lay back for me? Thank you. Now it is still really early so you most likely wont be able to see anything, but we may be able to hear a heart beat. So don’t get too worried if we cant see anything on the screen okay?”

“Got it Doc. No worries.”

After a few minutes of Dr. Jones working on the monitor they started to hear that small whooshing thump that could have only been one thing. The two athletes completely froze and looked at each other in amazement. “And there it is,” Dr. Jones said breaking the moment, “There is the heartbeat of your little one.”

“Wow,” Tobin said, tears forming in her eyes again. “Can you see anything?”

“Well, there is no human looking shape yet, but there is a small shape that looks about like a bean,” the Dr. started to say as she turned the screen towards them, “right here. Can you see that?”

“Oh wow, Toby,” Alex said with tears starting to slip out. 

“Look Al,” Tobin started.

“I see it Toby, I see it,” Alex replied through tears. 

The girls spent a few more minutes looking at the screen before Dr. Jones printed them off a picture and gave Tobin a prescription for prenatal vitamins and specific instructions to rest and not stress. She wants Tobin to take it easy still with her other injuries and they would discus the father and other things next week. Dr. Jones wanted to treat Tobin as a high-risk pregnancy for the time being just to be on the safe side. 

They decided they needed to start telling people about their relationship and Tobin’s situation. They dropped off Tobin’s prescription and headed to training. They figured the best place to start would be where they work. That would have the most immediate consequences. Then they would video chat with Tobin’s family and next Alex’s. After talking it over they knew the Morgans needed to know both about the relationship and the baby as soon as possible. They mad a plan for the day and started to execute it. Alex was taking the day off of practice, but would go to the gym and get extra work in. This was a bi-week for the Thorns so she could get away with it. Truth be told she was getting away with a lot of missing training lately. 

As they drove towards the stadium Alex noticed that Tobin was staring at the sonogram picture and jiggling her leg up and down like she does when she is nervous. The younger girl reached over and placed her hand on the bouncing leg. “Everything is going to work out babe,” she told Tobin. 

“I know, it’s just all so real now and I have no clue what I’m doing.”

“Neither do I, but we will figure this out together. I promise.”


	15. Telling the Team

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Well, this was a much quicker update than usual. I think I am finally getting a schedule down. Here you go. Let me know what you think. I'm trying to make up for you all hating me for the overall arching story line with some pice stuff. I'm sure there will be some not so fun things in the future (non as bad as the main plot twist itself). Much love.

Tobin and Alex walked up to the offices at the stadium hand in hand. Tobin stopped and held the door open for Alex partly to be sweet, but mostly to hide behind her as they walked in. Alex chuckled as she felt Tobin grab the bottom of her shirt. They walked in to talk to Coach and then they would go to the rest of the team. 

“Hey girls what’s up?” Parsons said as they entered his office. “Good to see you Tobin. We all miss you.”

“Hey Coach. Good to see you too. We actually need to talk to you about a few things. One is more serious than the other and I guess which one is which depends on you.” Tobin rambled off as she sat down. She wanted so bad to reach for Alex’s hand. It was her safety and Security here lately. 

“Sounds serious, but I’m sure its nothing we can’t handle. Unless you are leaving the Thorns. The organization might not be able to handle that one,” Parsons chuckled at the last part knowing Tobin would too.

Tobin did laugh, and she relaxed a little having a better sense of how this would go. She looked at Alex with a pleading look. She didn’t want to start the conversation. Alex understood and spoke up, “Coach, the first thing is something Tobin and I need to tell you together, but it appears she is being a chicken so I will say it. We are dating. It is a newly official thing, but I suppose it has been building for a while, but we were both being very stubborn about the whole thing. We are going to go tell the team after this, but we know this is something we need to tell you about and be upfront with.”

“Well, I can’t say I really saw it coming, but I am also very oblivious to a lot of the goings on of the team. As long as I see every one getting along and no one repots to me otherwise then I don’t ask questions. So, I am going to go about this in a professional manner since the two of you are doing the same thing. As long as this relationship does not affect the team or how either of you play then I am 100% okay with it.”

“Thank you sir,” Tobin spoke up. “And it wont be affecting my playing, because I will be out for a little longer than we though.”

“Why is that? Healing going to be slower than they initially thought?”

“Well, actually there is another reason,” Tobin paused and worked on gathering the courage to say it. “I’m pregnant.”

“Oh. Wow. Ummm.” Parsons sputtered out. He had no way to respond to this news. He was completely shocked and a little worried about loosing his best midfielder for even longer. “Umm, Congrats?” he said with a questioning tone.

Tobin giggled knowing they have officially made him more than uncomfortable. “Thanks Coach. It was a surprise to us to.” She got quiet again before speaking, “this happened because of the incident.”

“I figured it did, but I wasn’t sure where you stood on it. If you are happy, then I am happy for you Tobin. You know my players are all important to me, and that means I want what is best for you on and off the field. If you need anything at all just ask and I will do my best to get it for you. Thank you for telling me. Is there anything else I should know?”

“Just that we haven’t told our families yet, but we are today. So if you could not say anything to anyone for a few days that would be great. And I will be in full communication with our team doctors through the whole thing. And that this little future star will be a full-blown Thorns fan.”

Parsons chuckled at the last comment, “Alright Tobin, go tell the team and then go rest. Now you have to grow a human and heal yourself. I need my star mid back and healthy as soon as possible with that little one in tow.” 

Tobin stood and hugged Parsons before grabbing Alex’s hand and leading them out of the office and down to the locker room. They knew the team would be showing up soon to get ready for practice. They sat in silence for a moment. Alex holding Tobin knowing she was probably stressing too much. “Do you want me to tell the team about us?” Alex asked.

“No. I got this one. This one will be a bit easier.”

“Okay baby. They should be starting to show up soon.”

Like clockwork the team started to poor in. As they got ready and headed for the door Tobin stood up to stop them, “Wait, before you all go out to the field I have a few announcements to make to the team. Since most of you are here I guess we can go ahead and start. Alex can you come here?” Alex stood and walked over to Tobin. “The first announcement is this,” she paused, turned to Alex and kissed her. Alex was not aware that it was going to happen and it took her a moment to kiss Tobin back. After a moment of confusion from the team there were cheers and catcalls. They all knew it would happen sooner or later and knew Tobin needed something good in her life. “Alright now that the fun announcement is over.”

“Wait, Toby, I got this one.”

“Are you sure Lex?”

“Yeah I’m sure babe,” Alex moved the hand that wasn’t around Tobin’s back up to rest on Tobin’s still very toned stomach. She looked up at Tobin with love in her eyes and waited on her teammates to understand the gesture. After a moment a few of them gasped. Then Alex bent down and gently kissed her girlfriend’s stomach and suddenly everyone understood. Well, almost everyone. 

“What is happening? I don’t understand what this is all about?” Kling yelled from the back. She had walked in late and only caught the last bit of Alex kissing Tobin’s stomach. 

“Alex and Tobin are together and I think Tobin is pregnant,” Lindsey spoke up. The team still shocked.

“Yeah the first part I believe, but the second part not so much,” Kling responded.

Everyone turned back to Tobin and Alex with questioning looks on their face. “It’s true,” Tobin said with a small smile. “I am pregnant. It is a result of the incident. But I am actually excited about this new adventure in my life. I am not leaving the team, just taking a little more time off than originally thought. Now, we haven’t told our families yet, and I am going to look into some legal things before announcing my pregnancy to the world, but we wanted to tell you all because we love you so much.”

The team all huddled around them both. There were congratulations and comments form everyone. The team was so happy for them both. Not only for them finally pulling their heads out of their Asses and getting together, but for Tobin’s new and very unexpected adventure. 

“Alright, I took the day off today so I will not be out at practice, and Tobin has had a long day already so I am going to get her home and resting,” Alex told the team as they started their normal motions to go out to the field. 

“Good luck getting Heath to sit still!” Kling yelled as she rushed to get ready. The room erupted with laughter and the team all said one last congrats and goodbye as they headed out. 

One person lingered a little longer than the rest, Allie Long. “So, I knew about you two getting together, Alex kept me up to speed basically the whole time, but I was not aware of the newest team member. Tobin, I’m happy for you if you are happy about this. And whatever you need just call, I’m here for you Harry.” 

“Thanks Allie, I know it’s probably a little early for things like this, but I fully expect a “Harry” onsie for little Harry.” All 3 of the girls laughed at the comment and Allie hugged them both once more before heading out to the field. 

“Okay babe,” Alex said turning back to Tobin, “lets get you home. What do you say about a nap before Face Timing our families tonight?”

“Sounds prefect Lex.” They walked out of the stadium hand in hand. Tobin already felt much more at piece about the whole thing. She knew her team would have her back, but seeing it like this was even more comforting. She decided not to think about her family just yet. Alex was right, she needed to rest and take care of herself.


	16. The Heaths

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I know it is going slow at the moment, but I promise in the next chapter or two (haven't decided yet) it will speed up and fast forward through a month or two to get to some good stuff. Have some patients and stick it out kids. Much love.

The girls got home and started texting their families about doing a group Skype that evening. They decided to tell Tobin’s family and then Alex’s. They set up times and then they vegged out on pizza, and Netflix. Tobin drifted off to sleep in Alex’s arms. Alex held her girlfriend and took in the moment of peace. Soon they would tell their families, and then things would be even more real. Telling the team is one thing, but telling their families would be a whole new ball game, and the younger girl was anxious for them both. She had become very protective of her best friend recently, and not just because she was in love with her. She felt a need to protect her and make sure no one ever hurts her again. 

Alex let Tobin sleep. She let her sleep as long as she could knowing she had to wake her with enough time to be coherent for their calls with their families. She would go back and forth between watching the show and watching Tobin. At one point she realized that she had absentmindedly moved her hand to Tobin’s stomach. She knew she would only feel her abs, but she smiles anyway. Knowing there was a tiny Tobin in there was enough for her. Knowing she was going to be starting her family a lot sooner than planned was stressful, but the love she already had for the both of them made the whole thing seem right. 

About 45 minutes before they were supposed to call she started to wake Tobin up. “Toby,” she said while rubbing the girl’s arm, “you gotta start waking up babe.” The older girl rolled so that she was laying on her back with her head still on Alex’s lap. Alex leaned down and kissed Tobin. The older girl smiled at the feeling and started to sit up. She kept the contact as she sat up and moved herself more over Alex. After a moment she pulled back a bit and smiled at the younger girl. 

“Hey,” she said with a sweet smile. Tobin leaned in to kiss Alex once more before settling back down beside her. 

“Hey sleepy head. Have a nice nap?” 

“I did. Did you sleep any?”

“Nope. Just sat here and watched you sleep.”

“Creep,” Tobin joked then leaned in to kiss Alex again.

Alex let the kiss happen and then pulled away for a moment, “babe, we have to get ready to Skype your parents,” she protested. She did not put up much of a fight as Tobin moved to kiss her neck while she protested. “Tobin,” Alex warned halfheartedly.

“What?” Tobin mumbled as she continued her actions. She knew they should stop for now at least, but she wanted nothing more. 

“Tobin, baby, we have to stop. Your parents are going to call soon. We should clean up a little and grab a snack.”

Tobin stopped what she was doing, moved back up to Alex’s mouth and gave her a sweet kiss before pulling away, “okay Lex, okay. You’re right.”

“I know baby, but don’t worry. We can continue later if you want.”

Tobin looked at her with a goofy grin and kissed her on the cheek before hopping off the couch. “What do you want to eat? I’ll get it while you set up the computer.”

“Turkey sandwich please,” Alex, said as she got up off the couch to grab the computer. The first one she found was Tobin’s so she grabbed it and brought it back to the living room. She set the laptop down and opened it up. She heard Tobin humming in the kitchen as she made the sandwiches. Alex chuckled to herself as she started to pull up Skype. She realized that Tobin had left up the page about what rights fathers had. She scanned the page and tried to figure out what is going on in Tobin’s head. She knew Tobin didn’t want him anywhere near her baby, but she didn’t know how she was going to make sure that happened. She was so focused on the screen she didn’t hear Tobin walk back into the room. 

“Hey baby,” Tobin said as she sat down. “What are you looking at?”

“The page you found on paternal rights. We are going to make sure he never comes near this baby. I promise you Tobin, I will make sure of that.” 

“Oh, Lex,” Tobin started, “thank you.”

“What for?”

“For wanting to protect me and this baby,” Tobin said as she placed a hand on her stomach. 

Alex put her hand over Tobin’s, “I love you Tobin, and I love your baby so much already. I’ll do anything to protect the two of you.”

Tobin was about to lean in to kiss Alex when the computer rang. They both laughed and Alex kissed Tobin on the cheek before they settled in and answered the call. “Hey!” Tobin said as she saw her parents’ and brother’s face. 

“Hey kiddo, how are you feeling?” her dad asked.

“I’m better. Getting better every day.”

“Good,” Cindy answered. “You wanted to tell us something?”  
“Yeah, but I want to wait on Perry and Katie first.” Alex reached for her sandwich and Tobin handed it to her. “I want to tell everyone at once. It will be easier.” 

They went through the usual small talk while waiting on the girls to join. They talked about the Thorn’s season and how everyone had been in the past few weeks. Tobin was happy to see her parents relaxed and happy again. She watched them be so stressed and exhausted when she was in the hospital. She was sure they hadn’t slept in weeks. It was good to see them rested again. Her brother had been doing well too. It settled her nerves to see them. Eventually her older sisters joined the call and they all spent a few minutes laughing and catching up. The Heath’s had always treated Alex like family, and having here in the chat made it that much more whole. 

“Alright Tobs, what is this announcement you have?” Perry asked.

“Well, actually I have two. They first one I hope you will all be okay with. Umm, I know it isn’t something that is going to be easy for you all to hear, actually neither of them will be. But the first one will be harder I think.” Tobin babbled on putting off what she had to say. She was nervous and didn’t want to disappoint her family. 

“Love, just say it,” her mother encouraged with a smile. 

Tobin took a big breath and reached for Alex’s hand before finally spitting it out, “Alex and I are dating.”

“I knew it!” Katie shouted. 

“Katie!” Perry hissed at her sister. She could tell Tobin was more nervous about how her parents would take it than her siblings. 

All of them stared at the piece of the screen where Tobin’s parents were. They held their breaths in anticipation of the answer they all thought was coming. What none of them expected was to see Cindy Heath smile while her eyes started filling with tears. “Mom?” Tobin forced out. She didn’t know what to do in this moment. 

“Oh honey,” Cindy started as she tried to keep the tears back, “we know. Or at least we had hoped.”

None of the Heath children, or Alex, knew how to respond to that. “What?” was all Jeffery could utter out. 

“Tobin, sweetheart, I could tell how Alex felt about you just sitting in the hospital. I knew there was something far more than friendship there. I knew that she loved you then and there and I hoped that if you woke up you wouldn’t let her get away.” Cindy had started crying at this point and holing her husband’s hand. She wiped her tears and added, “and I saw you kiss when you thought we were still down in the cafeteria.” 

Alex felt Tobin’s breath hitch beside her and looked over to find her girlfriend crying at her mother’s words. “Mom,” Tobin said through tears, “dad, I love you.” Was all she could get out. Alex knew this was a mixture of her real emotions and probably a little extra hormones. 

“We love you too Tobin,” her dad started, “and we know Alex loves you.” 

“As long as she makes you happy then we are happy. We discussed the situation after we saw you kissing, and never for a second did we not approve. We could tell she made you happy, and after almost losing you we never wanted to see you hurt again.” The Heaths all shared an emotional moment and Tobin’s sisters teased the two girls before someone finally remembered that Tobin had something else to say. 

“Alright, what was this second announcement, I can’t imagine it will be as big as the first one,” Perry butted in. 

“Well sis,” Tobin started, “you’re wrong about that one.” No one said a word as they waited on Tobin. She turned to Alex looking for some courage. Alex nodded; she knew this was not her time to tell people. She would have her time in the next phone call. She squeezed Tobin’s hand in reassurance. Tobin reached to the side table and picked something up. The Heaths all stared at her with anticipation. 

“Well what is it?” Katie asked impatiently. 

Tobin looked down at the sonogram picture in her hand, “I’m pregnant.” 

“What?” was all anyone could say, but the word itself came from Perry. 

Tobin held the picture up for everyone on the screen to see. They couldn’t really believe it, but they did believe Tobin. 

“Okay,” Katie started, “I know how biology works and so I know it isn’t Alex’s. So, that means one of two things,” she trailed off not wanting to say wither of them. 

“Tobin, honey,” Cindy started, “are you saying what we think you are saying?”

“Yes mom,” Tobin looked down unable to look her family in the eyes. 

Alex decided to speak up for Tobin, “it is his, but more importantly it is Tobin’s. It isn’t going to be easy for her, but she has all of you and I am sure as heck not going anywhere.”

“Thank you Alex,” Jeff finally spoke up. It was hard enough knowing that someone had hurt is daughter, but now he couldn’t ignore exactly what he did to her. 

“I’m sorry dad,” Tobin said quietly.

“Oh honey,” Jeff started, “you have nothing to be sorry for. You have done nothing wrong. I’m assuming that you telling us means you have decided to not only keep it but raise it yourself?”

“Yeah, I know it sounds crazy, but I already love it so much,” Tobin said as she looked down at the picture.

“That doesn’t sound crazy at all. I loved all 4 of you the moment I found out we were having you, and I wasn’t even the one carrying you. So of course it doesn’t sound crazy to me.”

“Thanks dad.”

“Well, I hate to bring this up,” Cindy started, “but what are you going to do about..” she trailed off not wanting to say it. 

“I’ve already started working on that. I’ve looked into rights and what I can do to keep him away.”

“And I will do whatever it takes to keep them both safe and keep him far far away from them,” Alex said protectively. 

“Good. Thank you Alex. Thank you for everything you have done for Tobin,” Perry said. She was still shocked at the idea of her baby sister having a baby. She knew that this child was already loved beyond measure, and that was just from the looks on Tobin and Alex’s faces. 

The Heaths talked a while longer about what was going to happen in the future with soccer, the baby, and everything else. The eventually exchanged goodbyes and ended the chat. As soon as the call ended Tobin’s parents made plans to take a trip out to see the girls soon. They knew Tobin would be needing help once it all started to settle in. 

The second the chat ended Tobin leaned back on the couch and breathed a sigh of relief. Alex leaned back also, but pulled Tobin over to nestle into her. She knew Tobin would want to be held for a little while and not want to do anything else. It had been a long day for the two of them and they still had one phone call to make to Alex’s parents. Telling the Morgans was not as crucial as telling the Heath’s but it still needed to happen sooner rather than later.


	17. Thinking Out Loud

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whats up fam? I missed y'all too. Much love.

Telling the Morgans was not near as nerve racking for Tobin as it was telling her own family. The only thing that worried her about telling Alex’s family was telling them about the baby after telling they were together. She knew they would support their relationship, but about her dragging their daughter into raising a family was a completely different thing. How was she supposed to explain to them that this was not her plan and that she did not ask Alex to date her knowing she was pregnant? She would never to that to Alex. In fact, she had tried to tell Alex to leave her, but that girl was way too stubborn. 

After the last phone call ended, they decided it was time for bed. It was earlier than they normally went to bed, but Tobin had had a long day and Alex was starting back at training in the morning. She had missed enough and Tobin hated that she was missing for her. 

After shutting off the computer, Alex put away the dishes while Tobin took her vitamins and crawled into bed. Tobin had almost drifted off to sleep when she felt Alex’s body on the bed. She scooted over to where the younger girl was and wrapped her arms around her. Tobin kissed her gently, “Thank you Lex.

“What for love?” 

“Being there for me in all of this. You don’t have to. You know that right?”

“Of course I know that, but I also know that I want to be with you and nothing is going to keep me from that. Not even this little surprise here,” Alex placed her hand on the still toned stomach that she knew held a baby she already loved. She had no intentions of leaving either of them. 

“I love you.”

“I love you too,” was the last thing Tobin heard as she drifted off to sleep with Alex’s hand resting gently on her stomach. She slept happy and peacefully knowing she would be taken care of. 

 

The next morning Tobin woke to an empty bed. Alex was already up and getting ready for the day. She rolled over and stretched out. She tried to feel if she had gotten any bigger over night, but she knew she hadn’t. As nervous as she was for the whole thing, she was excited for that part. For feeling her baby grow and watching the bump get bigger. She wouldn’t admit that to anyone though. Not even Alex. Alex, who she was most excited to have talk to her growing baby. Alex, who she was so excited to go on this adventure with. Alex, who she really wanted to come back to bed. 

Alex walked by the bed and Tobin reached up to grab her hand. “Good morning sleepy head,” She leaned down to kiss Tobin, “how do you feel today?”

“Mmmm, good. One more,” Tobin whined. Alex chuckled and obliged. She bent down and kissed her a little deeper this time. Tobin pulled her down more forcefully and deepened the kiss more. Alex continued to give in until she was back on the bed, and more or less on top of Tobin.

“Tobin, honey, what are you doing?” Alex was enjoying herself, but she needed to get ready. 

“Kissing you,” Tobin said briefly before continuing what she was doing. She pulled Alex closer and flipped them so she was the one half on top of Alex. She continued and Alex knew she needed to stop or she would be late to training. 

“Baby, I have to go to training.”

“Ugh. You're right. I know. But I just want you to stay here all day. But I also want you to go to work. You have already missed too much for me. So conflicted.”

“Babe,” Alex kissed her sweetly before continuing, “how about I pick us up some food on the way home and then we spend the rest of the evening shut in with no one bothering us and phones off?”

Tobin was satisfied with the deal and rolled away so Alex could get back up. “Fine, I guess I will accept that offer.” 

When the younger girl got back up she noticed Tobin gently tearing her fingers over her stomach. She fell even more in love with her in that moment. Once again she was back on the bed, this time hovering over Tobin. She laced her fingers with Tobin’s over the older girls stomach. Tobin watching her the whole time. Alex smiled and kissed Tobin again. “Hey, I love you.”

“I love you too.” 

Alex got back up and finished getting ready. Tobin watched her the whole time. She watched as Alex got dressed and packed a bag. She grabbed shower stuff so she could shower at the field and come straight home to Tobin. Alex went back to kiss Tobin one more time. She leaned down and kissed her deeply, but sweetly. She smiled at Tobin as she walked out the door and off to training. 

Tobin laid in bed for a bit longer. She traced patterns on her stomach and talked sweetly to her unborn child. “Hey there kiddo. This is a crazy situation we’ve found ourselves in huh? I’ll be honest, I never saw myself in this situation. I wasn’t ever sure I wanted to have kids, and then Alex came into my life and I knew that if I was going to raise a family it would be with her. You don’t know her quite yet, but I’m sure you can feel when I get all happy. It’s her that makes me that happy. I still never saw myself actually having kids, but you kid are worth it already. I hardly know you and I can’t wait for you to be here. Well I can, so don’t go getting any big ideas. You stay in there until you are good and ready. You probably aren’t even big enough to hear and understand me yet, but that is okay. When you are you will know how crazy I really am. I love you kid, and I hope Alex will to.”

As she sat in the living room watching old soccer games Tobin decided to start looking at things she would need for the baby. As she scrolled through articles and advice pieces she absentmindedly talked to her baby about everything. She had an entire conversation about cribs with herself as if the baby were answering back. She ordered a few things already. A pregnancy book and a UNC onesie. Two essentials in her mind. 

As she kept researching and making mental lists she got lost in the whole thing and didn’t hear Alex come in. “Ya know kid, you sure need a lot of stuff,” Alex heard Tobin talking so she quietly set down her stuff. She assumed she was on the phone. “I have no clue where we are going to put any of it either. This is only a two bedroom apartment. Well, I guess I could move into Alex’s room if she will let me,” Alex smiled to herself. This goof. She thought as she continued to listen as Tobin talked to herself, “I think we will be alright kiddo,” Alex noticed that Tobin’s hand was on her flat stomach. “And Alex, well hopefully Alex will want to be your mommy too. And yes I know that will get confusing. Two mommies does seem like it could, but we have time to figure that out too.” Alex almost started crying and she accidentally bumped into something trying to turn and go into the kitchen. Tobin heard her and jumped up. “Lex,” Tobin breathed out almost in a whisper, “when did you get in?” Alex turned around and Tobin could see she was crying, “Lex what happened?”  
“Nothing,” Alex choked out, “I just heard you talking and wow.”

“Oh, Lex, I’m so sorry. You weren’t supposed to hear that.” Tobin started to back track, “I don’t want you to think that I am forcing you to stay here or anything. I was just thinking out loud is all. I know that this is a lot to taken in much less to live with. I would never expect you to just jump into this parenting thing with me.” Tobin started to move forward but then retreated back not wanting to upset Alex even more. Alex moved forward slowly, “Alex I am so sorry. I shouldn’t have even though it much less said it, I,” Tobin was cut off by Alex closing the gap and kissing her.

“Tobin, I’m not crying because I am upset. I am not crying because I don’t want those things. I am crying because seeing you talk to the baby like that and saying those things made me so happy. I know it is a lot, but if you’ll let me I would love to do this with you,” Alex leaned back a little and brought her hand to Tobin’s stomach. Tobin closed the gap again to kiss Alex. 

“You are the most amazing woman,” Tobin broke the kiss to say. This wasn’t broken for long before the older girl went back in. Tobin skillfully led them to the couch without breaking the kiss. Tobin sat first pulling Alex on top of her. They stayed there a few moments longer enjoying small touches and caresses. 

“Tobin, I brought food home. Aren’t you hungry?” Alex said when she could manage to pull away. She knew Tobin needed to eat and take her meds. The older girl forgets if Alex doesn’t remind her. 

“But I would much rather do this,” Tobin complained. Alex let it go for a little bit, but a few moments later Tobin’s stomach growled and both girls just laughed. “Dang kid, you’re killing the mood,” Tobin said to herself. Alex laughed and got off of Tobin to go get the food. 

“Because of you the food is cold,” the younger girl joke playfully as she bent down to grab what she had dropped earlier. 

“I can live with that,” Tobin said as she got up off the couch to help Alex. The two warmed up the take out and went back to the couch to watch Netflix while they ate. Alex told Tobin about everything that happened at training. Tobin had wanted to go with her this morning, but Alex insisted she get some rest. She would be back out to watching training soon. Alex knew that if Tobin went out there too soon she would try to play and get hurt. They didn’t need Tobin in the hospital any more that year. It was already too much for Alex. 

The two talked and laughed as they ate. When they were done, Tobin picked up the plates and trash. When she came back from the kitchen Alex had laid down on the couch and was almost asleep. Tobin picked up the younger girl’s head and sat down so her head was in Tobin’s lap. Tobin ran her fingers through the sleepy girl’s hair as she watched her drift off to sleep. She smiled to herself knowing she would had this for the rest of her life, and pretty soon they would be adding another one to the mix.


	18. Bliss Interrupted

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey fam! I know, I know long time no post. I'll be honest with you. College is hard friends. But hey, what can you do. Here is a little filler for you. What would a fanfic be without a little drama and a cliff hanger? Enjoy. With any luck you will have a new chapter by this time next week. Much love.

It had been two weeks of blissful and uneventful routine for the new couple. They built their lives and routines around each other and the idea of this baby showing up in a few months. At two months along Tobin wasn’t really showing yet, but still checked every morning. If anything, she looked like she ate too much dinner. 

Tobin still had some pretty rough morning sickness most days. She would try to sneak out of bed quietly to avoid waking Alex, but the younger girl could always feel when Tobin’s warmth and weight left the bed. She would wait a moment. Some days Tobin just needed to pee, but more often than not she was emptying anything she had left in her stomach from the night before. They had yet to figure out a trick to beat morning sickness, but Tobin remained hopeful. 

On the good days both girls would go to training and Tobin would try to follow the rules. She was still on minimum activity because of her injuries, and now even more so because of the baby. She was allowed to sit under the awning and watch if it wasn’t too hot, but she wasn’t supposed to run or mess with a ball too much. Alex would keep an eye on her throughout practice and yell at her if Tobin started juggling. It was had to keep the older girl from doing what she loved, but Alex wasn’t taking any chances with either of them so she set her rules and stuck to them. 

Tobin had been doing a lot of reading in her baby book. She highlighted and marked and wrote down different questions she wanted to look up. Alex thought it was endearing. She loved watching the older girl get so into the whole thing. Alex saw the UNC onesie when it came in and secretly ordered a UCal one. As far as Alex was concerned it was her job to make sure that little baby looked stylish and what better than a UCal onesie? Some evenings Tobin would read parts of her book to Alex. They would sit and talk about different baby things and to them it felt natural and right. After and hour or so of baby talk Tobin would pause, “did you ever think this would be our lives?” she would ask Alex. 

“No,” the younger girl would respond, “but I wouldn’t want it any other way right now.” The two would talk while Alex traced patterns over Tobin’s stomach. They would talk to the baby and tell him or her stories. They knew they would be telling this baby the same stories for years to come, but that didn’t matter to them. They would tell training stories, traveling stories, stories about World Cups and Olympics. Tobin would beam with pride telling stories of Alex making incredible goals, and Alex would tell the unborn child of how his or her mother would make professional athletes look like complete fools with her foots kills. These nights were Tobin’s favorites. 

Not all nights went this well. Some were painful. She was still having pain from her injuries, but some nights she would just feel warn out and exhausted. They had weekly checkups with Dr. Jones, and she said everything looked fine. She saw no cause for worry other than the pain, but she attributed that to the injuries and her body finally fully recovering. Tobin was aloud to take a few things for the pain, but not much. Some nights the pain would keep her awake, but she didn’t want to wake Alex up. So she would sit in bed and read or go online and research. 

This night was particularly bad. She was in so much pain that she was nauseous. She had been nauseous all day. She stayed home from training that day and slept as much as she could. She told Alex not to worry, but knew she would any way. Tobin hadn’t had much to eat that day. Anytime she ate it just came right back up. She didn’t tell Alex about that. She figured it was just a rough day of morning sickness. She spent the day on the couch. Sleeping, reading, watching Netflix, and trying to keep down any food she could. 

She had called it an early night after Alex had gotten home. The younger girl had some emails she needed to respond to, so she sat in bed next to Tobin while she slept. When Alex was done she set her computer on the nightstand and pulled Tobin in close to her. She could tell the older girl wasn’t feeling well, but she also knew there was not a whole lot she could do about it for the time being. She drifted off to sleep with Tobin in her arms, but when she woke up again Tobin wasn’t there. 

 

Tobin woke to a shooting pain in her head and the need to empty her stomach. She got up as gingerly as she could and made her way to the bathroom. She found some medicine and a glass. After taking the medicine she sat on the floor not wanting to risk going back to bed. She knew it was the middle of the night and hoped she hadn’t woken Alex up like she usually does. After a few calm moments she decided it was safe to get up. She made her way to the living room. She didn’t want to wake Alex up if she needed to get up again. She fell back asleep for a few moments before the urge to throw up took over again and worse. She made her way back to the bathroom just in time. She doesn’t know how long she was over the toilet, but after she wasn’t able to get up. She could tell something was terribly wrong, but couldn’t get up or even yell for Alex. She was exhausted. “Maybe a few minutes of rest and I will be able to get up and get to Alex,” she told herself as she slumped against the wall. She drifted off to sleep. The nest thing she remembers is hearing Alex scream and try to get her up. 

 

 

Alex woke to and empty bed. Not the normal empty that was still warm. No, Tobin had been up for a while. This thought startled Alex. She wouldn’t hear Tobin throwing up, and the house was too quiet for Tobin to be in the kitchen or living room. The younger girl shot out of bed, “Tobin?” she called out. When there was no response she can to the bathroom. What she saw made her heart drop. She found Tobin slumped against the bathroom wall covered in sweat and paler than anyone should be. She let out an involuntary scream and got to her in a second. “Tobin! Tobin, baby wake up! Are you okay? What happened?”

Tobin groaned in response as she tried to open her eyes. She knew Alex was right there with her, but she couldn’t see her and couldn’t talk back to her. The younger girl started to panic when she couldn’t get Tobin fully awake. 

“Toby, I am going to call for an ambulance, okay? We need to get you to a hospital.” Tobin groaned in response and Alex took that as an ‘Okay’ and ran to grab her phone. She dialed 911 and tried to explain the situation as calmly as possible. She knew it would be a bit of a struggle with them being on the second floor of the building, but it was her only option. She didn’t think trying to take her in herself would be a good idea. They patched her through to the paramedics on their way, and the men told her to grab a few things to make Tobin comfortable until they got there. Because she was slightly responsive and they knew it wasn’t an impact or contact situation Alex was able to do a few things to help. She grabbed a wet rag to wipe Tobin off with and wrapped her in a blanket. The paramedics stayed on the line until they got to the apartment. Alex ran to let them in a lead them back to where Tobin was. 

After about 10 minutes of the paramedic’s working on Tobin they were ready to move her. “Alright Alex, I want you to make sure you have all of her emergency type things. Insurance, contact list, medications, and anything you might need that can fit in one bag. Do that while we load her up and you can ride with us. Okay?”

Alex nodded as he spoke and then began rushing around the apartment. She caught a glimpse of them carrying Tobin down to the ambulance. She looked so pale and weak. Was that really her Tobin? She had never seen her that lifeless. Not even when she was in the hospital after the incident. For a short moment Alex let her brain wonder to the possibility that Tobin might leave this apartment and not come back. She thought about coming back alone to an empty apartment that had Tobin all over it. She pushed the thought from her head. She couldn’t afford to think like that. Tobin would make it back. She and the baby would be just fine. She had to believe that. 

 

It only took them 10 minutes to get to the hospital. When they did Tobin was wheeled inside and they immediately began working on her. Alex had to talk to a nurse about medications and previous health issues. After about 20 minutes Alex was lead to a waiting area. Tobin was being worked on and given every test possible. They didn’t have a room set up for her yet, but when they did and she was in one Alex would be taken back. She waited for what felt like hours. She made phone calls to the coaches and training staff, to teammates, friends, and her own family. She didn’t want to worry Tobin’s family yet, but she needed someone to talk to about the whole situation. She decided she would call Tobin’s family when she found out any information. 

A while later the nurse came out looking for her. They informed her that Tobin was going to be fine. She was dehydrated and exhausted and had a minor infection, but she was otherwise healthy and expected to be home in 24 hours. They were setting her up in a room and would come get Alex as soon as Tobin was set up. 

For the first time in what hours Alex felt like she could finally breathe again. Tobin and the baby were going to be okay, and that was all that mattered. She was going to be taking her home tomorrow hopefully and she was going to make sure Tobin took better care of herself. She didn’t want to be back in the hospital again until it was for the baby getting here. She especially dint want to end up here because she had to call an ambulance. 

As she was going over a list of things to talk to Tobin about, including her health, the nurse cam back to get her. “Are you ready to go see her Ms. Morgan?” the woman said pulling her out of her thoughts. 

“So ready,” the young forward hopped up and grabbed her bag. She didn’t want to leave Tobin’s side ever again. She wouldn’t tell Tobin, but she felt a small pang of guilt for not knowing the older girl had gotten out of bed when she did. She knew it wasn’t her fault. The logical part of her brain knew that she did exactly what she needed to get Tobin to safety, but the illogical part of her took the blame for it being so serious. She was already so in love with the two of them that she couldn’t stand the thought of anything bad happening while she could have prevented it.


	19. Freaking Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lucky for all of us, this is one of those rare times in my life when I have my crap together and my brain wants to write. Hopefully this is longer than normal. I am going to try and at least make the chapters I do manage to get out longer. I owe you all that much for sticking with it for so long. And as a side note, constructive criticism and helpful comments are welcome. Much love.

“Hey you, we gotta stop meeting like this,” Tobin said as Alex walked straight over to her side. 

The younger girl didn’t respond. Not with words at least. She leaned down and kissed Tobin as hard as she dared with her being in a hospital bed. She needed the physical contact to know that it was real. Tobin was really okay. She held the kiss for as long as she could.

“Wow,” Tobin breathed out when she was able to catch her breath, “what was that for?”

“You scared the hell out of me. I needed to be grounded again. You are what keeps me grounded. I thought I was going to lose both of you today.”

“Oh Al, you know I’m a lot harder to get rid of than that. A little dehydration and an infection can’t take me down.” Tobin was trying to make the situation a little lighter, but she knew it was pretty serious. 

“But Tobin that’s the point. A ‘little dehydration’ almost did take you. When I found you this morning I wasn’t sure if you were alive or not. My heart dropped at the thought of leaving this place without you. I can’t lose you. You or the baby. I’m far too attached already and that little guy or girl isn’t even mine.” 

“Al come here,” Tobin scooted over to allow Alex to join her on the bed. “Alex, one way or another this baby id yours too. If that means you want to be Aunty Alex then this baby is your niece or nephew, and it is perfectly understandable to be attached. If you want it to be in a more parental capacity then it is even more understanding. No one would blame you for being attached to this baby. Especially not me.”

Just then there was a knock at the door as Dr. Jones came in. Alex had called her office when Tobin was getting tests done. She wanted to check on Tobin herself. “Hey you two hope I’m not interrupting.”

“No worries Doc, you’re basically in charger here. Gotta keep this little one healthy,” Tobin said as Dr. Jones pulled over a chair to where the ultrasound monitor was. 

“Haha, alright then Tobin. Lets get a look here. There was something I noticed in your labs that I want to check on.”

“What is it? Is something wrong with her or the baby?” Alex started to panic. 

“Oh no. If it is what I think it and what it looks like in the labs then it explains why Tobin got so dehydrated and I promise it isn't bad. Not in nature at least.” 

“Okay, sorry. It has been a long day and it really isn’t that late,” Alex breathed out a sigh of relief. In truth it was only 6 pm. 

“Tobin,” Dr. Jones said turning to the expecting mother, “when I looked at your labs it appeared that your levels were higher than normal. In fact they were almost double what a normal expecting mother’s would be. So I am going to let that sink in while I check around here.”

It took Tobin a minute to understand what she was hinting at, but once she got it she just smiled in awe. Alex however was still silent and panicking. It wasn’t quite adding up right in he head.

“Well, it is as I suspected,” Dr. Jones said after a moment, “seeing as how both of you are reacting with this pregnancy I’m going to go ahead and congratulate you. Congrats, it’s twins.”

It clicked for Alex then. Twins. She sat in shock as she looked at the monitor. Dr. Jones had turned it around so both girls could see it. There they were. Two small little bean shaped masses. So many things were running through Alex’s head that she couldn’t speak. 

“Thanks Doc. This is kind of amazing. And you said this is probably why I got so sick?”

“Yes. Your body id still recovering, and needing more fluids and nutrition than we thought. I also assume you are doing more than you are supposed to when you go out to practices. So, for the next week or two you are going to be on house arrest. I want you either in bed or on the couch as much as possible. You need to let your body rest while it adjusts to not one, but two growing babies. You can get up and walk around a little, but I don’t want you going out to training or walking too much during the heat of the day. Understand?”

“Yes ma’am. I got it. Focus on the baby growing.”

“Focus on the baby growing,” she repeated. Dr. Jones printed off a few copies of the sonogram and handed them to Tobin. “Here ya go. I want you to stay here over night just so we can monitor you. We will have a nurse remove your IV in a few hours if you promise to consume more fluids. And you can most likely leave in the morning.”

“Awesome, thanks Doc. And thank you for coming down here.”

“It was my pleasure. See you in a week in my office,” she said as she left the girls. 

“Alex can you believe this? Twins!” Tobin turned to the younger girl and tried to show her the pictures. When Alex didn’t move Tobin looked up. Alex was still staring off into space in shock. “Lex?”

“What? Sorry Toby, I was thinking.” 

“Alex, I get that this just got a lot more complicated. So I am going to put my offer back on the table. You don’t have to do this. I understand. It was already amazing that you wanted to stay through one baby, and now it’s two. I get it.”

Alex couldn’t find words. It was all too much to take in. This morning she almost lost both Tobin and the baby, and now it wasn’t just Tobin and the baby. It was Tobin and two babies. How was she going to be able to handle the emotions of all that and keep Tobin healthy and following the rules. She would need to tell her family and they would need to find a bigger place to live. How were they going to do all of this? “It is a lot Toby. Twins? I mean wow. Its just a lot to take in is all.” Alex still sounded shocked and scared. 

“Hey, look at me,” Alex found Tobin’s eyes still alight with the excitement, “You should go home. Go back to the apartment and sleep on it. Sleep on it and let me know in the morning. I’ll call Allie and she can come get me in the morning. If you need me to I will start looking for a new place to live. I don’t want to push you away, but I don’t want you forced into a situation you don’t want to be in either. Okay? Can you do that for me?”

Alex didn’t know what to say, so she said yes. She gave Tobin the charger she had brought with her that morning and got ready to leave. “You call me if anything happens. If they come back and say something else is wrong. And I will give my number to the nurses to call. Okay?”

“Of course love,” Tobin agreed. 

“Thank you. I love you Tobin,” the younger girl leaned down and placed a loving kiss on Tobin’s lips. 

“I love you too Alex.” Tobin watched her leave then pulled out her phone to call Allie. She couldn’t stop staring at the pictures in her hands. Twins. She got her friend filled in on everything that happened that day and secured a ride for in the morning. They didn’t have training tomorrow so it worked out perfectly. Allie was excited to hear about the Twins, but concerned that Alex actually left. She knew she would be calling her eventually, so she let it go for the time being. She just wanted to make sure that Tobin was okay for the night. Tobin sounded worried about Alex, but in true Tobin fashion she wasn’t worried about Alex leaving. She could handle that. She was worried about Alex in general. It had been a long day for her. Allie promised to be there to pick her up and they hung up the phones. 

Next Tobin called her parents on Face Time. She wanted to show them the pictures. She wasn’t sure if Alex had called them yet or not. She assumed she had. Alex is responsible like that. They were thrilled about the news. Everyone was starting to get use to the idea of Tobin having a kid and it was becoming exciting. The Heaths were thrilled to be gaining two grandchildren and not just one. 

After talking to her parents and texting her sisters Tobin was ready to call it a night. She took one last look at her screen saver, which for the moment was her and Alex, and laid her phone on the bedside table. “Alright little ones, ya know you didn’t have to scare Alex like that to make yourselves known. We would have found out eventually. I promise to take better care of us. No more overdoing it. I will have plenty of time to play soccer after you both get here. I can’t wait to teach you. If you don’t like playing that is okay, but you will have to put up with watching for a ling while because the Alex Morgan is going to be in the game for a long while, and hopefully we will be right there along side her for the ride. I love you both so much already. I can’t wait to meet you, well actually I can. You stay right where you are for like 7 more months.” Tobin drifted off to sleep dreaming of her and Alex, and their hopeful little family. Of soccer games and first days of school. Of world travels with the Gals, and championship shoulder rides under the confetti and lights. She never imagined her life would be like this, but she didn’t want it any other way. 

 

 

Alex walked through the door of an empty apartment. She was right. She was returning to her apartment without Tobin, but at least it wasn’t because Tobin was gone. She understands why Tobin sent her home alone. She needed a little tie to calm down and think through things. It’s not that she doubted Tobin, or that she didn’t want their sudden little family. She doubted her ability to do it right. She was panicking about everything already and it had been half an hour. She didn’t think she would be good for one child much less two. But here it was, her girlfriend and the love of her life was having twins. 

She was still running through everything in her head from this morning. Finding Tobin in the bathroom and thinking she was dead. Calling 911 and heading to the hospital. Pacing the waiting room floor while on the phone. Sitting with her head between her knees waiting on answers. Seeing Tobin in yet another hospital bead as she cracks a stupid joke. It was just like Tobin to joke after almost dying. And then “twins.” It was still sinking in. two babies. Not one, but two. How was she going to handle that? But every time she wondered how she would handle it she felt guilty thinking about how Tobin had to handle the hard part. Twins would take a toll on her body, but if anyone could have twins and then come back to their professional soccer career, it was Tobin. Tobin was determined and never stopped moving. 

She was going to have to figure out how to keep Tobin still. Oh lord. How was she going to do that? Tobin hated sitting still. She had minimum 2 weeks of basically bed rest. Tobin on bed rest for 2 weeks? Impossible. That girl can’t sit still for two minutes. And what if Tobin didn’t want her help? What if Tobin changed her mind down the road and didn’t want her in the babies’ lives as much? Alex wasn’t sure if she could handle that kind of pain. To have them so close and yet not be able to love them like she already does. 

The young forward paced the apartment. She wanted them in her life, but she wasn’t sure what she would. If Tobin still wanted her then they would need a bigger place. Their apartment was spacious for two athletes, but for two athletes and two new babies there was no way. She got online and started looking for a bigger place for all of them. Within an hour she had 3 different apartments picked out. All ground floors and each complex had a playground and a pool. Two of the three were gated communities as well. She couldn’t decide which one so she called and got numbers for all three. She started making pro and con lists. One of them would let her start moving in tomorrow. Being who she was in the community they didn’t require too rigorous of an application process. If she could bring proof of who she was in the morning then the apartment was hers. 

Alex was starting to feel better, but she needed help. She called Allie and told her to come over as quick as she could. She pulled out every suitcase she had and started packing. She knew she wanted to have most of it done if she decided to do this so Tobin didn’t have to do any of the hard work. When Allie got there Alex opened the door and went right back to what she was doing. “There is a list on the counter. I need help deciding which apartment,” Alex yelled over her shoulder.

“Apartments? Al, are you just going to move out and not tell Tobin? Have you lost your mind?”

“I’m not moving out.”

“So you’re kicking her out? Alex, you have lost your shit.”

Alex came out from her room looking as confused as Allie, “no. We are moving. This apartment is way too small for the four of us. Wow, the four of us. Never thought I would say that at this point. The list is of apartments I have already found, called, and checked reviews on. I can’t decide. One of them will let us move in in the morning.”

“Jesus Al, you had me going there for a minute. I was gonna kick your ass for doing that to her. I’m glad to see you haven’t lost your mind. Well, this is a little crazy.”

“Tobin will be on lock down for a while. I don’t want her to be having to worry about space and if I get this done tonight/tomorrow she wouldn’t have to do any lifting or worrying about me lifting. I was wondering if you would help me decide and maybe see if the team would help me move?”

“Of course! I'll look over this and let you know. So, twins huh?”

“Twins. Can you believe it? Tobin is going to be a mom of twins, and I’m going to be,” Alex trailed off unsure how to finish her sentence. 

“Well kid, what do you want to be to those babies?”

“I’d like to eventually be considered their mom. Most of that decision isn’t up to me. I want to be in their lives no matter what. So the rest is up to Tobin. She has going through so much already. She could see this as a curse or an inconvenience, but she doesn’t. Allie you should have seen her light up at the pictures. She was so excited the second she found out, and all I could do was panic about their health and safety and space and keeping Tobin from doing anything for two weeks. That is basically impossible.”

As Alex kept rambling Allie had picked an apartment she thought would be best. It was the one that would let them move in in the morning. It was first floor, three bedrooms, two bath, spacious living room and kitchen, and was gated. It was perfect. “This one,” she interrupted Alex’s nervous rambling and handed her the paper. “Call them and tell them we will be there in the morning and go start packing. I will be in there in a few.”

Alex did as she was told while Allie pulled out her phone and mass texted the team. She filled them in on everything that was happening and told them to be at the apartment at 7:30 in the morning to get everything moved over and set up before Tobin got out of the hospital. The team was going to be gaining two of its biggest fans in a few months and they needed to make this as smooth as possible for mom. 

Allie walked back into Alex’s room, “alright kid, we have to have everything as packed as possible before morning. The team is coming over to help. We are going to have everything moved and set up for her to come home to tomorrow. We gotta kick it into high gear here though. Can you do that?”

The younger girl started crying, “Thank you Allie. This means so much to me. I just want to take care of Tobin, and I want those babies to have a place to grow.”

“I know kiddo. Now get packing.” 

They spent the next 5.5 hours getting everything as packed as possible. They had to take a break to go buy boxes and dinner, but apart from that break they worked fast and got it all done. The last thing they needed to do was take the bedding off of Alex’s bed. That and the big furniture would be worried about in the morning. Alex couldn’t sleep so she started looking at cribs, dressers, changing tables, and anything else she thought would be needed for the babies. She made lists for each item and smaller pro con lists of each one she found that she liked. She would give these to Tobin as suggestions, but the ultimate decision on that end was hers. She wanted to be as helpful as possible with the process, but she also knew that had a little bit of time to worry about it. 

Allie had called a moving truck company before joining Alex in packing. She would go pick it up at about 7 and one of the girls would take it back after. They would use it for the big stuff first, and could use cars for the smaller items that needed to be moved. They didn’t have a full plan worked out, but they knew about what was going to happen. 

Alex had decided that (if she wanted to) her and Tobin would share the master bedroom. This would mean that the 3rd room cold be used for an office/trophy room. The twins would be sharing a room for at least the first couple years. Alex was hopeful that by the point at which they needed their own rooms they would have a house with a big back yard. Eventually Alex was able to relax and get some sleep. Tomorrow was going to be a busy day for her and she wanted to be ready for it.


	20. Moving Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I have realized that there are holes in my story. I am going to start trying to address and fix them in the coming chapters. let me know anything i need to address. Much love.

            7:30 sharp and all but one Thorns player were standing outside in front of Alex and Tobin’s apartment. Allie gave instructions on what to pack and how and they got to work. She had her phone on loud for when Tobin called to be picked up. Alex was on her way over to the new place to get keys and sign papers. The team had the big things packed into the truck and over to Alex by the time she was done with the paperwork. She would have to have Tobin sign the papers too when she got there, but that cold wait. They got the big stuff moved in and then Alex took a handful back while Allie stayed to organize the furniture a little more and work on getting the electronics set up. They didn’t have a whole lot of time so they had to hurry.

 

            Alex helped the girls get everything in the cars. It took about an hour to get all of their belongings packed into cars and back over to the new place. Tobin called Allie a few minutes into unpacking.

 

            “Hey Tobs, you ready to go?”

 

            “Yeah they are going to get my discharge papers now. Can we stop for lunch on the way home? I haven’t had good food since I got here. You know how the food is here.”

 

            “Yeah of course. What ever you and the babies want.”

 

            “Sweet. See ya in a few?”

 

            “Yep. I’ll head that way.” Allie hung up and found Alex in the big apartment. “Hey Al, I’m headed to get Tobin. I’m going to take her to lunch and then to the mall. I figure we can shop a little. It will give you guys time to finish here.”

 

            “Perfect. Thank you so much Allie. I’ll text you when we are done. I may have to run back over to the old place to turn in paperwork and pick up a package that should be here today.”

 

            “Sounds great. I’ll go get Harry.”

 

 

 

 

 

            When Allie got there to pick up Tobin she was waiting on a bench outside. “Harry, how are you feeling today?”

 

            “Much better. I have strict rules to follow and I have to drink a lot more water, but I should be good.”

 

            “I think we can manage that. What do you want to eat?”

 

            “Any place with pizza.”

 

            “That I can do. Then I figured we could do a little shopping if you are feeling up for it. I want to spoil my nieces or nephews. Or one of each I suppose.”

 

            “Yeah I should be up for that.”

 

            Tobin scarfed down a burger, two orders of fries, and a shake. Allie got her a giant bottle of water at a gas station before they made their way to the mall. They shopped around different stores for a few hours. Allie insisted on getting onesies that said “Thing 1” and Thing 2” on them. Her reason being “I’ll be their Cat in the Hat.” Tobin let it happen. It would be nice to have more than the two baby things she has bought.

 

            After they had gone through every store Allie was nervously checking her phone. “What’s wrong?” Tobin asked after a few times.

 

            “Oh nothing. I am just waiting on a package to be delivered today. It should be any time now.” Allie lied. She knew it was a pitiful attempt, but she hoped Tobin would buy it. She did. “So, you really have to start thinking of names now. You’re going to need two. Any thoughts?”

 

            “Umm, haven’t really given it much thought, but I love the name Greyson. And it works for either a boy or a girl.”

 

            “Ooo, I like that,” Allie figured now was a good a time as any to ask about Alex. “So, about Alex?”

 

            “What about her?”

 

            “How does she fit in to this whole situation? Fun Aunt Alex? Mom’s girlfriend? Where do you want her in all of this?”

 

            “Well, the main thing I want is for Alex and my babies to be happy. If I get it my way then she will be mom too. I want to spend my life with her. I always have. You know this,” Allie nodded in understanding. Tobin was willing to stay single forever to keep Alex as a main part of her life, “I know that this is not how she saw or even wanted her life going, but I hope that at some point she will know she is just as much apart of their lives as she is mine. She was the first person to know about them, and I want them to have her in their lives in the biggest way. I know she would be good to them. I just don’t want her to feel trapped by me and these kids that aren’t hers just because she feels guilty. I want her to feel like they are hers, but I know that is hard when she isn’t the one carrying them.” Allie’s phone chimed as Tobin paused, “package delivered?” she joked.

 

            “As a matter of fact it is. Lets go.” They stood up and made their way to the car. Allie knew this surprise was going to be perfect. She shot Alex a quick response: _Al, you have nothing to worry about. She is going to love this. She loves you. She wants you._ Allie drove off towards their new place. Tobin didn’t recognize exactly where they were going. She just figured they were headed to Allie’s she never really went to Allie’s from any origin that wasn’t her apartment.

 

            After a few more minutes she realized they weren’t headed to Allie’s apartment either. They were pulling into a gated complex. Allie punched in the code and they drove on. Tobin didn’t ask any questions until Allie parked the car and had Tobin get out. “Where are we?”

 

            “Just follow me,” Allie told her.

 

            Tobin did as she was told and followed Allie towards a ground floor apartment. She was confused when Allie just walked into an apartment without knocking. “Allie where are we?” Tobin’s confusion only grew when she saw Alex and their furniture in the apartment. “Alex? What are you doing here?”

 

            “Tobin,” Alex stepped closer, “I moved..”

 

            “Oh,” Tobin interrupted, “okay. I understand. I’m sorry.” Tobin was holding back tears. She knew there was a chance Alex would leave, but she didn’t expect it to be like this.  

 

            “Oh no Toby, let me finish baby,” Alex reached for Tobin’s had and pulled her closer, “I moved us. One baby takes up a lot of space, and two babies take up even more. We were going to need a bigger place and I didn’t want you to have to deal with worrying about it or actually moving. This is our place love.”

 

            “Our place? You moved us?”

 

            “Welcome home Tobin.”

 

            “Alex, I don’t know what to say. I can’t believe you did this for us. I thought you were telling me that you were leaving.” Allie took the opportunity to take out her phone and get pictures of the two girls embracing as Tobin realized what this all meant.

 

            Alex pulled Tobin in and kissed her gently. As she pulled away she kept eye contact with Tobin, “I’m not going anywhere. I will admit that I did freak out when we found out that it is twins yesterday, but only because I was thinking of all of the things we would need, and how out apartment was too small. I was thinking about trying to keep you and them healthy and safe. I was freaking out, but not because I don’t want this. I want you, I wasn’t this, and I want them,” Alex placed a hand on Tobin’s stomach and leaned in for another kiss.

 

            Allie sent the pictures to the team with the caption: _Team, the mission was a success. Little mamma is home and happy._ As she hit send Tobin pulled her into a tight hug. “Thank you Harry, for everything.”

 

            “Hey, its no problem. Its nothing you wouldn't do for any of us. Besides, I’m already just as in love with these little ones as Al is.” Allie hugged her again before dismissing herself and heading out.

 

            “Hey you,” Tobin said as she walked back over to Alex, “you are absolutely amazing. Did you know that?” She kissed the younger girl again. This time with more passion and gratitude.

 

            “Hmmm, I was hoping you would say so,” the younger girl smiles and kisses her again. “So, you want a tour of the new place?”

 

            “Heck yeah!” Alex slipped her hand into Tobin’s and led her through the apartment. They spent 20 minutes in the kitchen with Alex showing her where they put everything when moving in. after that it was the living room and bathroom.

 

            “Okay, now I have to tell you something before we see the bedrooms. You can change it if you want, and that okay.”

 

            “What’s up babe?”

 

            “There are three rooms. I made one of them an office space, one is for the nursery, and I made the master for both of us. Is that okay?”

 

            Tobin leaned in to kiss Alex before she answered, “I loved hearing you say nursery. And I would love to share a room and a bed with you.”

 

            “I loved thinking of a nursery for the twins. I even started looking up cribs and things, but we can go over that list later. Now lets go look at the rooms.” They walked across the hall from the bathroom to what will be the office. Alex hadn’t had the time to get desks and things yet, but she would do that later. After that they made their way next door to the to-be nursery, “I picked this as the nursery because its right across from ours and it has the bigger window. It also has a walk in closet which I figure will be helpful with all the stuff they are going to need.”

 

            “Al, I love it. We can definitely make this room prefect. Thank you baby.” They shared a sweet kiss before Alex excitedly dragging Tobin into the master bedroom.

 

            “We can redecorate if you want, but this is just what happened while we were unpacking. The closet and bathroom are huge. I already put all of our clothes and things away. Come on, you gotta see this bathroom,” Alex looked like a kid at the zoo and Tobin was falling more in love with her by the second. “Tobin look at this tub!” The older girl just chuckled at her girlfriend as she ogled over the master bath.

 

            Tobin had to admit, it was impressive. There was a tub and walk in shower. Two lager sinks so that Alex had plenty of room for all of her beauty products. Tobin understood her excitement. The tub looked so relaxing and inviting.

 

            Alex drug Tobin back out of the bathroom and into the bedroom so she could actually look at it. When she was finally able to look around she noticed the décor. Alex had framed a picture of the two of them from the World Cup Final and hung it between both of their medals. She loved it. She turned to the bed. The bed they had already been sharing for the past month. It felt more real and official this way. Only having one bed in the house.

 

She noticed something on the bed and walked over. Alex stayed where she was a few feet away. When Tobin got to the pillows she saw what Alex had draped over them. Two onesies. Tobin recognized the UNC one she had bought herself. The other one was UCal. She picked it up and turned to Alex, “When?”

 

            “Last week. It got in this morning. I was originally planning on just putting the baby in it when you weren’t paying attention, but now it looks like we are going to need both of them. I know this whole thing is new, but I want to do stuff like this with you. I want to buy onesies and talk about baby things. I want to try and brain wash them on which school is better. I don’t know where you want me in all of this, but I will play whatever part you want. I love you and I love them. I just want what is best for all of you.”

 

            “Alexandra Morgan this is perfect. You have done so much for us already. Not just us,” Tobin said while placing a hand over her stomach, “but us as the four of us. As a family. You didn’t have to do all of this. Last night when you left I was worried you wouldn’t want this much commitment, but today you found and moved us to a new apartment without me even knowing. It is amazing Alex. You are amazing.”

 

            “I’m glad you like it. Now I think its time you get some rest. Take a nap while I wait on the guy to come hook everything up. I don’t plan on being back in that hospital until these babies are joining us. Got it?”

 

            “Yes ma’am, but on one condition.”

 

            “And what is that?”

 

            “Lay with me while I fall asleep?”

 

            “Of course beautiful,” they climbed into bed and Alex wrapped Tobin up in her arms. She knew it wouldn’t take long. She could tell how tired the older girl was after the quick tour. Hopefully the guy would come and go before she woke up. She didn’t like bothering Tobin with these things. After a few minutes she felt Tobin’s breathing even out. “I love you Toby,” she whispered as she carefully climbed out of bed and tucked her in. she laid a quick kiss on her girlfriend’s head before making her way to the loving room to wait on the cable guy. While she waited she texted Allie

 

Alex: _Hey, send me those pics you took._

Allie: **Image attached.**

Allie: _Here ya go. How is she?_

Alex: _She’s good. I made her take a nap while I wait on the cable guy. She was exhausted after looking around the apartment. Thanks again for all your helps by the way._

Allie: _Good, she needs to rest. Gotta keep those babies healthy. And you’re welcome. The team loves you both and they were happy to help._

            Alex didn’t have time to respond before there was a knock on the door. She let the cable guy in and then sat at the kitchen table while he worked. She worked on a few things on her computer for her book, and returned a few emails about camps. She knew that she would be going to the next few National Team camps without Tobin and she wasn’t sure how she felt about that. She knew that Tobin would want to be there, but even if the babies weren’t the reason she was out she would still have injuries to be recovering from. She was sad about not having Tobin there, but every time she thought about the babies she couldn’t help but smile. She was beyond excited to start this life with Tobin.

 

            After about an hour the cable guy was done and all of their stuff was set up and ready to go. All that was left to complete their home was office and nursery furniture, and the twins of course.

 

            Alex was so focused on what she was doing that she didn’t hear Tobin wake up and walk into the kitchen. Tobin walked up behind Alex and wrapped her arms around the younger girl. She gave her a quick kiss on the cheek, “hey pretty girl, what you up to?”

 

            “Just work. Did you have a nice nap?”

 

            “I did, thank you. What work?”

 

            “Responding to emails about sponsors and camps.”

 

            “Man, I’m gonna miss camps. That’s gonna suck.”

 

            Alex moved to have Tobin sitting in her lap on the chair, “but they are worth it,” she said placing her hand over the babies.

 

            “That they are,” Tobin placed her hand on top of Alex’s. “You hear that? You’re worth missing a national team camp. That means you’re pretty special.” Alex laughed as Tobin continued to talk to the twins. She loved hearing Tobin talk to them. “Al, we are going to have to do something soon.”

 

            “What’s that?”

 

            “Well, our teams and families know about us and the babies, but we wont be able to keep it a secret for long. At least not the babies. I’m gonna have to announce it somehow.”

 

            “I have an idea,” Alex had Tobin stand up as she walked back to the bedroom.

 

            “Al? Where are you going?”

 

            When Alex came back she had both the onesies in her hand, “get your phone out and come here.” Tobin did as she was told and followed Alex to the couch. They both sat down and Alex handed Tobin the UNC onesie. She set them up so that they could hold both of them and take a selfie. They took one with them smiling, and one with them kissing. “There, now if you want you can post these on all forms of social media and just let it sit for a few days if you want before putting out a full story.”

 

            “That’s perfect Al. Thank you.” Alex had sent her the one that Allie snuck of them too. Tobin took to instagram and put all three pictures plus one of both sonogram pictures into a post. She hit send and it was out there for the world to see.

 

_Tobin Heath: We have been keeping a little secret, or two. Surprise! #Twins #TinyTobins_

            “You okay babe,” Alex asked when she noticed Tobin looking a bit anxious.

 

            “Yeah I’m good. It needed to be done for a few reasons, but it makes me nervous to think that now he will know. He will know that he was successful and that he will have kids. I just don’t want him coming anywhere near them. However, on the plus side, I can do this in public now,” she leaned over to kiss Alex sweetly, “and that is worth it enough.”

 

            “Tobin, they aren’t his. I mean he may biologically be their father, but they are yours and yours alone. I will make sure he doesn't come anywhere near you let alone them ever again. No one touches my girl but me. And baby I cant wait to do this whenever I want,” Alex returned the kiss before getting up to take the onesies back to their room.

 

            “Al, I’m hungry, what are we doing about dinner?”

 

            “I’ll order some take out and we can watch this weekends games, how does that sound?”

 

            “Perfect baby, thank you.” Alex ordered the food and they started watching New Girl. Alex made sure to order extra food for Tobin. She also made the older girl taker her vitamins while she ate to they would hopefully settle better. After they ate and cleaned up Tobin snuggled into Alex’s side as they continued their binge watching. About 20 minutes into their marathon Alex noticed that Tobin had fallen asleep. She laughed at her girlfriend and managed to get her laying down on the couch. Tobin’s head was on the other end while her lower legs and feet stayed on Alex’s lap. This gave Alex the ability to grab her computer and do some work. She put a pillow between Tobin’s legs and her laptop. She set out researching paternal rights and what to do about making sure the man that did this to Tobin never has them. She found an attorney the specializes in these kinds of cases and sent him an email explaining the situation. She explained that he had already been found guilty and sentenced. He wasn’t supposed to be out for a long time, but Tobin can't exactly go off the grid. All of that had been taken care of while Tobin was still in the hospital. She didn’t have to see him in person or make a public statement. The authorities were willing to keep her as far away from him as possible and keep her privacy safe. He was sent across the country to a high security facility in Texas.

 

            Alex took a break about an hour in to check on all the social media buzz around Tobin’s post. She decided to respond back with her own post. She put a different picture of her and Tobin kissing along with the sonograms and the two onesies on instagram with a caption and then turned her notifications for it off for a bit.

 

_AlexMorgan: Looks like we’ll be needing both of these. #Twins #TinyTobins_

 


	21. Plans

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> College is hard, but graduation is soon. Hope this doesn't suck. Too tired to re-read and fix anything today. Much love.

A month went buy for the girls without too many issues. Tobin would still get sick, but she was following the rules and Alex was making sure she was taken care of. She was starting to show and both girls were over the moon about it. Alex loved being able to see them. It made it more real for her, and Tobin loved watching Alex talk to them. 

It is now mid-September and season had ended. The Thorns went 10-6-8 on the season and got knocked out by FCKC in the semi-finals. The semi final match had happened during the second week of Tobin’s bed rest. Both girls knew she shouldn’t watch the game unsupervised and she couldn’t travel, so her sister came to visit while Alex was gone. It was heartbreaking to watch the team lose from so far away, but she knew Alex would be coming home to her soon. Since the Semi-final game the girls have been spending time together and preparing for Alex to go off to National team camp. Tobin hated that Alex was leaving, but she was proud to be the girlfriend of the Alex Morgan and knew that she had to let her girlfriend go to work. 

Both girls made the realization after season that Tobin wouldn’t just be missing camps, but also the World Cup. Tobin was upset for a few days, but she knew she would do anything to be in Canada to watch the team play. Friends and family had already offered to go with her and help with the babies. They would be about 3-4 months old. The estimated due date is March 15th, but Dr. Jones has also explained to Tobin that with twins they typically arrive early. 

The girls started looking at things for the babies’ room and decorating their new place. Tobin had ordered a few cute soccer decorations while she did more research on cribs and things. She wanted to make sure her baby's got the best they could afford. Alex would find her intently staring at the screen and would chuckle at how cute her girlfriend looks while she’s working so hard. Tobin included Alex in all of the decisions. Well, all but one. Tobin secretly designed and created a set of onesies to surprise Alex. She didn’t know when she would be ready to show her, but she knew she wanted this to happen. 

The onesies were matching USA jersey replicas that said mommy on the back, but instead of one number they had two. Both little baby jerseys had both Alex and Tobin’s numbers on them. Tobin ordered them in several sizes. One set was 1-month while the biggest was 4-months so they could wear them for the World Cup. She wasn't sure when she wanted to show Alex, but she knew she wanted to be prepared for when she did. This was a big decision. NOt just for Tobin, but for Alex as well. They both had to want this in order for it to work. What Tobin didn't know was that Alex was planning a surprise of her own.

While Tobin was on one side of their dining room table researching the best car seats and double strollers, Alex was on the other trying to find out the best ways to keep their “father” from being in their lives. She was also designing a ring. She had picked out a silver band that was simple and elegant just like her midfielder. She had embedded a diamond in the middle of two aquamarine gems on one side. She was hoping the kids decided to “cook” until at least March 1st so that the ring was correct. If not she would get it changed. She knew when she wanted to propose. If it worked out they would both be going home from the World cup with some hardware. 

The girls had no idea what the other was planning, but each knew it would be special. 

 

 

One day in the middle of month four Alex decided she wanted to take Tobin on a date, “Hey Toby, we don’t have to be anywhere tonight right?” Alex asked knowing they didn’t have to be.

“Al, you are the one in charge of my schedule. You would know better than me.” 

The younger girl laughed before walking over to the table to kiss her midfielder, “then I am going to take you on a date. You, me, and a nice dinner. How does that sound?”

“Mmmm, sounds great babe,” Tobin kissed her back and placed her hands on the forwards hips. Tobin pulled Alex down on to her lap while the younger girl snaked her hands through Tobin’s hair. The sexual tensions had been growing between the girls, but Alex always held back. She didn’t want to hurt the older girl or upset her. She wasn’t sure what she would be comfortable with so she always let Tobin take the lead. This would end up with them cuddling in the end, something with shirts on and sometimes not. The forward was okay with this because she loved the older girl. She would do anything to have every level of intimacy with her, but never wanted to push it too far. 

Alex would still wake up to Tobin reliving what happened to her, and it scared Alex more than she let on. Tobin has told her everything that she remembers in as much detail as she can muster and it makes Alex sick. It makes her stomach churn to think that someone can do that to anyone much less her Toby. 

“Alright, I’m going to go shower and get ready,” Alex said stopping what was soon to be a heavy make out session. She had plans for how she wanted tonight to go. It was going to be all about Tobin and her comfort. 

“Meanie,” Tobin said as she stuck out her tongue like a toddler. Alex laughed at her girlfriend and then walked back to their room to shower. 

 

 

A few hours later they were heading out the door to a fancy restaurant across town. Alex had made reservations earlier in the week just in case. She was hoping Tobin would be feeling up for going out. The girls pulled up and Alex walked around to open the older girl’s door, “wow, didn’t know I was getting those kind of treatment tonight,” Tobin said as she stood out of the car. She leaned in to kiss alex before they walked into the restaurant. 

Tobin ordered an obscene amount of food and Alex was thrilled to see her eating as well as she was. Tobin was gaining her appetite back after being sick the week before and it helped the younger girl to calm down some. They both had just water. Alex opting out of wine to make sure Tobin didn’t feel alone. The older girl smiled at the gesture. They ate and made comfortable conversation about the gals and the camp Alex was leaving for in two weeks. Tobin made plans to go see her parents for a few says so that she wasn’t alone in the apartment the whole 4 weeks alex was gone. After dinner Alex drove them to a park near their apartment and they got out to walk around. 

They walked hand in hand for a while, but eventually Tobin needed to sit down. “Hey, can I run something by you?” Alex asked as she sat down.

“Yeah sure babe.”

“How would you feel about Allie and me throwing you a gender reveal party when we get back from camp?” Alex knew Tobin had that appointment while she was gone, but she wanted to do something nice for Tobin. 

“Sounds great babe, but can I make one request?”

“Yeah of course.”

“I want you to do it with me. I want you to be surprised too.”

“Oh,” Alex froze. She didn’t know Tobin would want that. She knew their relationship was going well, but she didn’t know what that meant.

“If you want to that is. I want you to be just as involved in this as I am. If you want.”

“I’d love to Toby. I will help Allie, but she will do all the specifics. Sound good?”

“Sounds perfect babe,” Tobin leaned in and kissed the younger girl sweetly. She loved her, and wants her as much apart of this as she is comfortable. 

The girls walked back to the car and headed home. Alex opened the door for Tobin once again and helped her in the car. They rode home in a comfortable conversation about the upcoming camp and qualifying games. Tobin missed playing, but being able to still talk about soccer at this level gives her comfort and familiarity. They talked game strategy and lineups. They talked about the gals and having Tobin facetimed in for a group dinner. She missed the gals and couldn't wait to see them again. 

Before going out, Alex got Allie to help her set up a surprise for Tobin for when they got back. When the couple walked through the door there were candles (fake battery powered ones) set-up throughout the living room. Allie had set out various different movies and snacks on the coffee table. There were two plush blankets and a big body pillow on the couch waiting for them. “Al,” Tobin sighed at the sight of it all, “how?”

“How what baby?” Alex asked, placing a kiss on the older girl’s cheek. 

“How did you know that is exactly what I have been needing?” Tobin was hoping she and Alex could get a nice night alone before the younger girl had to leave for camp. “I wanted to find a night where it could just be us and movies all night before you left, but I never know your schedule.”

“Love, this is all I have wanted to do for weeks. I want to make you happy, and I want you to rest. So, I made it happen. I had Allie pick up all the newest movies from Redbox and set up some snacks. Tonight it's just you and me,” Alex learned to pull Tobin close to her. She couldn't get quiet as close as she wanted to because of the twins. The younger girl chuckled and looked down, “and these two,” she added, placing a hand on the ever growing bump in between them. “Come on, we have a whole list of movies to watch. I also took tomorrow off to finish any we don't get to tonight.”

The girls got comfortable on the couch. Alex leaned against the arm rest with her legs spread across the couch and Tobin leaning back into her from between her legs. This was often the only way Tobin could get comfortable. Laying like this gave her the perfect angle that relieves pressure off of her back while also giving her something (or someone) to lean on. Tobin’s head rested snuggly on the younger girl’s shoulder. They were half way through their first movie when Robin had to pee. She got up as Alex paused the movie. The forward took that time to pick up anything they had already eaten and make sure there were enough blankets and pillows for Tobin to be comfortable. 

Alex was patiently waiting on the couch when Tobin finally came back into the living room. “Hey you,” she said to the older girl, “everything okay?”

Tobin didn’t answer her with words, but moved slowly and carefully to straddle Alex and kiss her intently. The kiss lasted until neither girl could breathe. 

“I’ll take that as a yes?” Alex chuckled while she caught her breath. 

“Yeah everything is fine. More than fine because I get to kiss you,” the older girl leaned back in to kiss Alex again. The younger girl liked where this was heading, but wanted Tobin to know that it was all up to her. Alex relaxed into the kiss and let Tobin take the lead. The kiss heated up quickly and both girls found themselves breathless. “Alex,” Tobin managed to say between breathing and keeping constant contact with the younger girl. 

“Yes love?” she was worried, but didn’t hesitate in her motions. 

“Can we move this somewhere more comfortable?” Tobin pulled back adn looked up ath her shyly. The older girl was never very aggressive when it came to being physical with someone, but her hormones kept asking for more. More contact, more touching, more Alex. 

“Of course babe,” Alex gave her a quick peck on the lips before gently getting them both off of the couch and leading Tobin by the hand to their bedroom. She gently led Tobin to the bed and down on to it. They slowly worked back into the rhythm they had in the living room. With Tobin taking the lead, both girls lost their shirts shortly and soon the only sounds in the room were of breathless kisses and appreciating moans.

A few moments later and Alex was left only in her underwear it Tobin beneath her. Tobin thought she was the most breathtaking woman in the world and seeing her like this was almost calming for her. Tobin knows Alex has been taking it slow and letting her take the lead. She can tell, and she appreciates it. It’s not that she doesnt want this with Alex, she wants this. She isn't sure how she will react in the moment. She isn't sure what memories or flashbacks she might have, but seeing Alex in this moment helps to reassure her. She knows this is what she wants and that anything ALex does is full of only love and adoration. 

“Alex,” Tobin starts, “it’s okay. I want this. I promise. I know you’re taking it slow for me, and I love you all the more for it. Honey, you don't have to worry. I will tell you if i need you to slow it down. Okay?”

“Tobin, you’re 100% sure? We can stop anytime you need to.”

“Baby, I’m sure. Now come here and make love to me,” Tobin pulled her closer to reuse Alex even more. The younger girl smiled confidently and leaned back down to kiss Tobin. She moved slow still, but with intent. Every move had a purpose and she had a plan. Tobin raised her hips to help the younger girl remove her shorts. Alex explored Tobin’s body lovingly. She took the time to appreciate every feature. She stopped to give extra love and attention to the beautiful baby bump that was making its way into their lives. She was here when Tobin felt something different, something that scared her at first. She left our a startle gasp, “Alex wait.” 

The younger girl jumped back completely off the bed, “Tobin I’m so sorry. What did I do? Do you want me to leave?” She rambled our apologies and questions faster than she runs on the field. 

“Al,” Tobin said more calmly after a minute, “you didn't do anything wrong. Breathe, and come back over here.” 

Alex slowly moved back to Tobin. The older girl held her hand out for the younger girl. Alex took it cautiously, “What happened?”

“Here,” Tobin placed Alex’s hand on her stomach, “I think the babies just kicked for the first time.” Alex’s eyes go wide. 

“Really?” She is more relaxed now, and noticeably excited. 

“Really. Right where you were is where they kicked,” Tobin chuckled at the thought. “Hey,” Alex looked back up at Tobin, “I’m sorry I scared you. To be honest at first the feeling scared me, but I was never uncomfortable or scared by you. I promise. I was just shocked is all.”

“Okay Toby,” Alex moved to kiss Tobin sweetly with her hand still where the babies were kicking. She couldn't feel it as much as Tobin, but every so often she could feel a little something. They sat like this for a moment just enjoying each other’s company. 

“So,” Tobin spoke up, “do you wanna continue what we were doing before they decided to make their presence known?”

Alex hummed before kissing Tobin again, “I’d love to if you're up for it.” 

Tobin’s response wasn't words, she pulled the forward closer to her and kissed her with as much passion as she could muster. The girls spent the next few hours finally exploring each other completely, and eventually falling asleep wrapped up in each other. Tobin tucked in to Alex’s side with the younger girl’s hand protective over her stomach. 

 

 

Alex to the sunlight creeping in through the window. She reached out for Tobin, but found her side empty. She looks around the room taking it all in. She was still unclothed from the night before and smiled at the memories. She got out of bed and put on a big t-shirt and shorts before heading to find Tobin. She found her in the kitchen humming to herself as she made breakfast. The forward silently moved to snake her arms around TObin from behind. “Mmmmm, smells good babe,” she said with a kiss to Tobin’s shoulder. 

“Thanks love. You hungry?”

“Starving,” Alex placed her hands over the babies, “how are they this morning?”

“I can feel them kicking even more today,” Tobin replied as she turned around to put the last of the food on the counter. As she did Alex stopped her and bent down to be eye level with the babies. 

“Hey you two, be good in there okay? Don’t be giving your Momma too much trouble today. I want to spend the day with her, and I would prefer to do that on the couch and not in the bathroom,” Alex paused to place a kiss over the bump, “I love you both.” She stood up to kiss Tobin, “and I love you.”

“We love you too Al,” Tobin gave her a quick kiss back before grabbing two plates out of the cabinet for breakfast. The two spent the day watching all the movies they didn't get to the night before, which was all of them. They were at peace in their own little world. Just the two of them in their apartment. Alex couldn't wait for it to be the four of them. When Tobin would doze off she would quietly talk to her about all the great things she saw for the both of them. She talked about how it would be at the World Cup with the both of them, and her plans to propose. She imagined them in a few years with the twins starting to walk and run around. Alex was ready to take this adventure head on, and she needed to find the best way to do that without giving away her proposal plan too soon.


End file.
